Mommy Musings

Here's What I Know

2011-07-06T13:38:00.005-05:00

Selling your house is stupid! You hear me out there people, don't do it. Our house has been on the market for 13 months!!! And in these 13 months we haven't had one offer, not one. Yes, I am aware that this is a tough market and we knew going in that this could take some time... just wait until you try it.

I feel homeless. All of the things that make my house my HOME are packed in boxes in the basement. All the pictures of my kids growing up that I had hanging on the walls, all of the kids art that I had framed, my organizer for my bills, my movies...not to mention painting my kitchen tan (oh how I miss you red kitchen)! I live in a museum. Our real estate agent had a stager come to our house and change things even more a couple of weeks ago, all in the name of renewing interest. Now my house looks even less like my own. I hate it.

Not to mention the showings. Ugh, the showings, a necessary evil if one is to ever sell their house, but I cannot impress upon you the inconvenience they are. I am currently sitting at Bread Co because someone wants to see my house. Great, buy it then!! Because these 1 hour warnings telling me that my house has to be pristine are killing me!!! I have children, they are not pristine in their cleanliness. Running around like a chicken throwing things in drawers and closets to meet your time demands...well, it's getting on my last freaking nerve!

That's another thing that is bothering me about the selling process, I used to have neat and organized kitchen drawers...not so much now. Everything that you aren't supposed to have out in eye of the "public", all in the name of depersonalizing your house, are shoved into every drawer and cabinet in my kitchen. I can no longer find anything in there.

I want to take my house off the market. I don't care if it takes me an hour to get to work, I don't care if my house feels too small for us now. Who cares if this was only supposed to be our starter house, I'm ready to die in the house if it means we can take it off the market and I can have my pictures back. None of our reasons for selling seem like good ones anymore.

Enough whining! Heed my words people, this is a ridiculous process that I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy.

Endings & New Beginnings

2011-05-11T16:00:00.000-05:00

Today I finished nursing school. Let me just take that in for a moment (stunned silence). This has been four years in the making and I'm having a bit of a hard time grasping that this all encompassing thing is done. I finished. Wow. Not only did I finish but I am graduating with honors. You don't understand how huge this is for me.

See, once upon a time, there was a teenage girl. Although this teenage girl was smart, she was full of attitude and didn't give a crap about her grades in college, she had no regard for the future. She dropped out of college and left an awful GPA behind her. This teenage girl grew up, became a responsible member of society and wanted to go back to school. Little did she know that her previous GPA would follow. It took a lot of hard work but I have overcome the misdeeds of my teenage self and for that, I am proud.

This all seems so surreal. I have been a student for a long time and now I will be joining the work force on June 6th. I'm excited and scared, it all seems to be happening so fast and yet, it's been happening forever.

I just wanted to write this down to mark the occasion. This is a good day, a very good day.

Just Call Me Grump

2011-03-24T14:23:00.002-05:00

I'm grumpy and sullen and I know it. I have told myself over and over that I will not be grumpy or sullen or bitchy or pissy or anything else but happy...it's not working. Telling yourself that you are going to be happy and actually being happy are two totally different things. I'm grumpy.

Stress is the cause of this immense attitude problem. I am less than 2 months away from graduation and while that alone should put an expansive smile upon my face, it does not. I cannot being to tell you how much stress comes with graduation. End of school projects, papers, finalizing paperwork, test, quizzes, the list goes on and on. Not to mention the two biggest stressors: 1) Passing boards. I'm scared to death of this test and the implications if I do not. It is a terrifying prospect. Sure, I can take it again but the pass rate grows smaller every time you take it. 2) Getting a job. Once upon a time, getting a job as a nurse was an easy task. The "nursing shortage" made you a hot commodity, those days are over. Let's just say that a new grad getting a job is about as common as finding a pot of goal at the end of a rainbow. My husband brings up the job search every day and I get to tell him about all of my lovely rejection letters and lack of interviews.

I am trying for a more positive outlook, I'll let you know if I find it. In the meantime, I'll be here, being grumpy.

Music Murderer?

2011-02-21T14:09:00.003-06:00

Yep, music murderer is what I am being called in my house these days. Let me explain. I have a very nasty habit. When I get new music it is ALL that I listen to. I replay it over and over ad nauseum to everyone but me. This is only really a problem when I am in love with some new album that Chad hates. Case in point, The Black Keys. Chad hates them (I know, he has no taste). I played the album Brothers for weeks straight, then I burnt myself out on them and I'm done. Hence the murder comment. I listen to whatever album until even I don't want to hear it anymore. There are a few notable exceptions: The Beatles, of course! No one ever gets tired of The Beatles, The Frames/The Swell Season and Damien Rice.

The current love of my life is Mumford & Sons. I heart them so very much. Any of my friends who haven't had the pleasure of hearing them, you should really listen. They are the best new folk music has to offer. They might make it to the bands I never tire of. I think that Chad is worried I may wear out Mumford & Sons, he loves them too (although, he'd never say love, he'd say "They are pretty cool").

Anyone else do this? Or am I completely alone?

Here is a link to Mumford & Sons - The Cave

Winter is Stupid

2011-02-02T16:21:00.002-06:00

I hate the cold. I hate the snow.
OK, I don't hate snow. In moderation, snow can be beautiful. Sledding is fun, you sure as hell can't do that without snow. The amount of snow that I have seen this winter is absolutely stupid. And because there has been this ridiculous amount of snow, my kids have had an unthinkable nine (that is NINE) snow days - shoot me!

I know that it is awful to say that, don't look at me with judgment filled eye. Do I feel bad because me kids drive me completely insane when they are stuck in doors? Yes, I feel bad. My feeling bad about that doesn't make it any less true - my kids drive me nuts. The fighting, the screaming, the "Mooooooooooooom, he's doing xy or z", I cannot take this anymore. I wish I could be one of those mothers who sees this a valuable opportunity to spend enriching time with their children. Well, I don't. Call the firing squad.

I love my kids. They are beautiful, funny and even wise. Lock them in a house for three days straight and they become raving maniacs trying to tie one another up and throw each other down the stairs. You think I am kidding. They are going stir crazy, as am I. Yes, we have gone out and played in the enormous amount of snow, even that has lost its fun.

I need to get out of this house. I'm running low on provisions because the kids are eating everything in site and worst of all, I am out of wine.

Fingers crossed that school will be in session tomorrow. I doubt that it will, temps will be too low, a girl can dream though.

Book Report

2011-01-24T22:31:00.002-06:00

It's no secret that I am a very busy girl. With school and the kids, it leaves very little time for my most favorite of pastimes, reading. During Christmas break, I made the best of my time off. I have my bio-dad and Chad to thank for for it, they kept me knee deep in books. As a matter of fact, the only presents I got this year (save a very beautiful pair of Uggs) were books! I figured I'd give you all my take on my most recent cerebral endeavors.

The Short Stories
1. Wolfsbane & Mistletoe by Charlaine Harris & Toni L.P. Kelner (and a whole bunch of other people).
This collection of short stories had two elements in common - first, they all had werewolves and second, they were centered around Christmas. It was an easy read.

2. Many Bloody Returns by Charlaine Harris & Toni L.P. Kelner (and everyone else)
This collection had the two components of vampires and birthdays.

3. Death's Excellent Vacation by Charlaine Harris & Toni L.P. Kelner (are you seeing a theme here?)

4. A Touch of Dead by Charlaine Harris

OK, you want to know what I discovered about short stories? I hate them. Not the writing or even the stories themselves, they are just too damn short. The author is trying so hard to get characters established (half the time they fail and characters come across very one dimensional), get to the climax and wrap of the damn story, that half the fun of it is gone. Don't get me wrong, there were a couple of short stories that I would have wanted to read the entirety of a novel based on it. But, that the thing, I wanted a novel. The only exception to this was A Touch of Dead, because I felt like that was a continuation of other Sookie Stackhouse books.

Novels
5. Dexter by Design by Jeff Lindsay
This is the 4th book in the Dexter Morgan series. What can I say? I love these books! Dexter is the serial killer that you love to love. Jeff Lindsay's writing is absolutely hysterical in some spots and frightening in others. I found myself laughing out loud on more than one occasion. And, I have to say, it was a way better book than that of book #3 (Dexter in the Dark, not good).

6. Dexter is Delicious by Jeff Lindsay
This is the 5th book in the Dexter series. Like book #4, it was witty, clever and disturbing. Seriously, I don't know what the hell happened to Jeff Lindsay during book 3, but if he keeps writing like the last two, I'll never stop reading.

7. Awakened by P.C. Cast & Kristin Cast
Excuse me for getting all tween for a moment. This is book 7 or maybe it's book 95 in The House of Night Series (yes, I'm 33 and I have read them all). First of all, it is my sister's fault I read this...drivel. It is a vampire series about a chosen girl and her friends trying to overthrow a dark power amongst vampires (or do they spell it vampyre...who knows). These books are very quick reads. They are very dramatic, just like all the teenage girls that read them. I will say that in the beginning, I liked these books a lot (if you could get over the teenage speak), now I am pot committed. I've been reading these books for what feels like forever and I swear the time line is like a week. I'm just trying to get to the conclusion at this point.

8. The Fire by Katherine Neville
The sequel to a good book written more than 10 years ago. I was a fan of The Eight because it was unique, it wasn't something that I had read before. Even the plot was different that anything I had read and have read to date. With that said, I think that she should have left well-enough alone. The first book was complex, but I enjoyed its complexity. This one was complex, boarding on insanity. I am still not sure how it all fits together and I sure as hell HATED the ending. It was one of those endings where you look at the book, reread the page and then start searching for more pages because surely this cannot be it. Maybe I will reread it and find that all the answers are there and I am just to blond to see it at first read...it won't change the ending, so forget it. FAIL.

So, eight books in a 4 week period, not too shabby. I am currently in between books, a place I never like. Recommendations are welcome.

P.S. I'm not doing too bad keeping the blog going. This post was really fun!

P.S.S. This post here make 100! Sad, since I've been posting for 3 years, I think. Oh well.

Life is good, it really is...

2011-01-20T12:11:00.003-06:00

I am trapped in my house today, due to the snow. My last semester of school started yesterday, so I have minimal homework...what to do? I figure, this is a brilliant opportunity for me to catch up on my friendly blog reading (something I am trying to do more of). What should I find when I poke my nose over on Alicia's blog? I have been tagged with a blog award. So, here is what must be done - I have to 1) thank Alicia: Thank you, Alicia! For giving me something to write about when I can come up with nothing by myself. I appreciating you having my back (or in this case my hands).
2) answer some questions about myself - which isn't my favorite topic of discussion but I hope you find it interesting, and 3) pass it on!

Here are the answers to burning questions:
Q1. If you blog anonymously, are you happy doing this? If you aren't anonymous, do you wish you started out anonymously so that you could be anonymous now?
I've never been anonymous and really don't see the point in being anonymous, it's not like I care what people think about me.

Q2. Describe an incident that shows your inner stubborn side.
Heck, I don't know. I am one of the most stubborn people I know...but, I can't give you an example. You'd have to ask my husband, I am sure he could name a few thousand incidents.

Q3. What do you really see when you look at yourself in the mirror?
That's a very tough question to answer honestly. I see a wife, a mother, someone still striving to like themselves.

Q4. What is your favorite summer cold drink?
Non-alcoholic? Lemonade, like the real kind, Crystal Light will do in a pinch. Alcoholic? Cold? I guess it Bacardi and Diet Coke with Lime. Anyone who knows me knows that I drink wine and love it almost as much as I love coffee.

Q5. When you take time for yourself, what do you do?
I love to read, LOVE it. I also like to get a nice pedicure, while reading and occasionally clothes shopping.

Q6. Is there something you still want to accomplish in your life?
I'm doing that now. I'm only a few short months away from getting my BSN. I have been kicking around the idea of getting my Masters degree, that's still up in the air.

Q7. When you attended school, were you the class clown, the class overachiever, the shy person, or always ditching?
I was sporty in school. I played basketball, softball & volleyball.

Q8. If you close your eyes and want to visualize a very poignant moment in your life, what would you see?
I would choose Aiden's accident. One, because Alicia picked holding her baby for the first time already and I will not copy that :) Two, because it is still very fresh and three, because for a brief moment in time, I thought I was going to lose my son. Why would I want to visualize this? Because I am all the more appreciative of what I have.

Q9. Is it easy for you to share your true self in your blog, or are you more comfortable writing posts about other people or events?
It's easy for me because, like I said before, I don't really care what people think about me. Besides, if I didn't write about my life and family, what in the world would I talk about (lol).

Q10. If you had the choice to sit down and read a book or talk on the phone, which would you do and why?
Are you kidding, is there even a choice here? Read.

Spreading the love:
Cristina at Homeslice
Kristin at What's Up With The Joneses
Helena at Three Snakes & a Rooster

I'd pick more but my friend Jenni was picked by Alicia and I don't follow that many blogs.

Open or Closed?

2011-01-14T17:03:00.002-06:00

I have been toying with the idea of closing down this blog for awhile. I wrote all of 3 times, maybe it was only 2, last year. Yet, every single time I get close to deleting, I just can't seem to press the button. I think that I like the idea of having an outlet, if and when I should need one. The truth is, I need an outlet. I have a lot of stress in my life and it is nice to get it all out there and off my chest, I just never seem to do it.

I guess I will give myself a deadline, an ultimatum of sorts. If I haven't written 3 blogs (not including this one by March 1st, then I will indeed shut the blog down. So there you have it. It has been decided. Now, let's see if I can manage to put together anything worth reading over the next few weeks.

Another Semester

2010-08-23T21:23:00.003-05:00

Fall semester started today. And so begins another 4 months of hell. Sometimes, I honestly wonder why the hell I subject myself to this. Yes, I know it is a higher education. Yes, I know that I chose this. It doesn't make this any easier.

I have OB, Peds and Adult Health this semester. Which should prove to be interesting, except I am the only female in the entirety of nursing school that does not have ANY desire to go into these fields (I'm exaggerating, of course). I have zero desire to look at vagina all day and zero desire to see the horrible things that can happen to children. So, like I said, this should be an interesting semester.

I am, however, excited that I am getting closer to graduation. Only 264 more days until all the hard work finally pays off. It will be a wonderful moment for me, I believe I will truly make my children proud. I hope that I am showing my kids that it's never too late to do what you want to do.

Speaking of the kids, both boys are back to school and enjoying themselves. Aiden is healthy, his biopsy came back normal. As you can imagine, that was a relief. Anyhow, as we are getting into the groove of school once again, I am certain to be scarce, which is a shame. I hope to get back here and update this soon. I like having this little record of life :)

Summer from Hell

2010-08-04T09:40:00.004-05:00

I have no excuse for not writing except that I am very busy these days.

I haven't blogged since January and I haven't been keeping up with my friends blogs either. I sat down with the intention to do both, blog and read, and it just doesn't work out. I find that I have so much to do and so much to say that I can't really put my thoughts in order to write a cohesive blog entry. Plus, as some of you know, we have had the summer from hell.

Nothing is ever boring here at the Peterson household. With two little boys, things are generally in a constant state of controlled (and sometimes not so controlled) chaos. This summer has been a little different than most. Aiden was injured 3 days into his summer vacation and it has been hard on us all. For those that don't know the story, here is what happened:

Chad, the boys and I went to visit Chad's parents. The have a vacation house on a lake and a lot of property. They have a golf cart that they use to transport stuff from the lake house to the boat. Brink (Chad's 15 year old brother) wanted to take the boys on a quick ride around the property that morning. This was no big deal, he has done it before and has always been exceedingly careful with my children.

He was out with the boys when Nikki (Chad's sister) and I decided to go to the grocery store. Brink saw that we were leaving and wanted to get away from the small road that we had to travel to get to the main road. In Brink's attempt to get away from the road, he turned to quickly, hit a bump and Aiden was thrown from the golf cart. Aiden hit his right side on the non-padded armrest when he was thrown. There is some confusion as to what happened next. According to Brink, the above is all that happened, Aiden was thrown, that is all. Aiden has no memory of the accident, however, Liam was there and he has stated over and over that Brink accidentally ran Aiden over with golf cart after Aiden was thrown. Truth be told, I am more inclined to believe Liam.

Brink brought Aiden back to the house on the golf cart. Aiden refused to breath, because the pain was too great, he began to turn blue. Chad rushed Aiden to the hospital, called me and I met them there. At first we believed that he had broken a rib because of the kind of pain and location of the pain.

After a quick examination by the doctor, I knew and informed Chad that this was WAY more serious than a broken rib. Aiden's abdomen was slightly swollen, it was extremely tender to the touch, he was pale. A CT scan revealed that Aiden had a grade 3 liver laceration. The doctor informed us that this little hospital didn't have the facilities to handle Aiden's case, they needed to transport him. Chad asked if they were going to do this by ambulance and the doctor said no, they needed to air-lift him to a bigger hospital. My heart sunk. At that point I left the room to cry because I didn't want Aiden to see me. I knew that this was very serious.

Chad was stronger than I was, he waited until the helicopter left with our child before he broke down and cried. I cannot express the worry and heartsickness in seeing your child being taken away from you to get emergency care and not being able to do anything. It is the worst and most helpless feeling in the world.

Chad, Liam & I drove the 1.5 hour drive in a daze. I hardly remember anything about that part. Just the nagging worry and helplessness and fear that my child may die before I got there.

When we arrived at the hospital, the staff put us in a consult room and left us there. I work in a hospital, I know what consult rooms are for. I nearly came unglued. They didn't tell us why we were in the consult room, they just said that someone would with us soon. These were the most anxious and horrible 15 minutes of my life. I truly thought that I would never see my son again. Just typing this, I can still feel the anxiety, it still brings me close to tears.

Finally, someone came and got us. They told us that Aiden was alright and didn't need surgery. Relief flooded me. Chad was holding Liam so tight and crying silently, we both cried...it was overwhelming.

Aiden spent 6 days in the Pediatric ICU. I won't go into detail about how much I hated the hospital staff, most of you saw it on facebook. We were so glad when we got to bring him home. It will take him 6 months to recover fully. During the first 3 months (which is nearly over) he has had to wear a protective rib covering (like quarterbacks wear), all day, every day (he hates it). He is on a strict no activity policy until December, so no gym class or recess for him when school starts. He was very disappointed to hear that. Otherwise, he has been recovering very well.

Of course, this one traumatic event should be enough to last us a life time. Unfortunately, this is not the case. Aiden had his 7 year check up two or three weeks ago. During this routine check-up, the doctor discovered a mass in Aiden's tonsil. It takes up more than half of his throat. We contacted a specialist and Aiden has to have surgery tomorrow, he will have his tonsils and adenoids removed and biopsied. The specialist strongly feels that this isn't cancerous but they have to come out nonetheless. So, fingers crossed that the biopsy comes back negative because until they do, you just never know.

No, I didn't forget about Liam. He has been a really trooper through all this. He loves his brother and has been as good as you can expect a nearly 5 year old to be under these stressful circumstances.

I'll be glad when this summer is over.

Chicken Soup

2010-01-05T09:46:00.002-06:00

Maybe I should have named this, rambling about nothing. It's just a mish-mash of thoughts that are rattling around in my brain.

My winter break has given me the opportunity to see what I have been missing with my children. All of the sudden, Aiden seems so...grown up. He says some truly hilarious things, then gets self conscious when you laugh. He won't sing in front of people anymore, he'll go to his room and sing alone. He is truly feeling his adolescence, he hates everything he is "bad" at and loves things he can master quickly. He is a math genius! The kid can do multiplication, at 6 year old, in his head! It blows my mind. He had figured out math really easily, so Chad explained to him basic multiplication, it was not a problem for him. Insane, I'm decent at math but, I always had to really try and focus on it. I guess he gets this from his Dad.

Liam, what can I say about Liam? He is still completely insane!! He keeps me on my toes with his parent favoring, today I am the lucky one, tomorrow...who knows. The kid loves to play Chad & I against each other. I see many years of butting heads with him (he is a lot like me). When he is not doing this though, he is truly a fantastic and lovable child.

I had so much fun with the boys while they were off from school. Although, I wasn't sad to see them get back to school. They are at an age where they fight a great deal when they spend a lot of time together. Having them in school means that they only spend a few hours together at night, then they seem to enjoy being around each other more. I'm sure the arctic weather, which kept them inside the whole of the break, didn't do anything to help.

I'm actually feeling a little guilty about going on my trip next week. This is a first! I have never had a problem taking a break from the children. Generally, it was because I spent so much time with them that I figured it was healthy for everyone involved to have a little space. This is not the case this time. I haven't been just a SAHM for a while now and my time is more precious with them. I know that it is OK to take a vacation and that I have worked hard for it, I still feel kind of bad about it. I'm sure a few Mojito's and Margarita's while sitting in 80* weather will help with the guilt.

Hmmmm, I guess that forced writing the other day has helped with the writers block a little! I actually have idea for another post!! Holy cow!

Writers Block

2010-01-02T07:56:00.002-06:00

I have not died.

For the past few months I have been so busy that I had absolutely no time to write. You would think that with all that has been going on I could write a novel, not so much. Every time I would sit down to write something, nothing would come. I still feel that way. I got nothing. I figured if I forced myself to write something, anything, maybe the creative juices would begin to flow again....nope.

I hope that you all have a fantastic New Year!

Finding My Footing with the Flu

2009-10-16T15:30:00.003-05:00

Nursing school has been very hard, harder than I had imagined. I never thought it would be a walk in the park. I never thought it would be easy. I also never thought that I would want to quit, but I did, more than once.

It's hard to be a wife, a mother, and a student. I had managed this very well until this semester. I guess I had idealized Nursing school, I just knew this was were I was supposed to be. But, as I have gone through school this semester, I had begun to question it all. I wasn't making the grades I was used to, the material was harder, I wasn't a natural at it. All of this scared me. More than once I tried to figure out what major I could change to with all the classes I had taken, that wouldn't put in school for another year. *sigh*

The past two weeks have been better and I have been finding my way through all this. I have made it over the hump by finishing some very hard practicals (i.e. putting in a catheter and nasogastric tube). Things have been looking up, but not as much as they did today.

Today I had flu shot clinic, I was really nervous before I got there. Once I was there, I was excited and nauseated. I was worried about sticking people and happy that I was going to stick people. It was confusing.

My group was assigned to the morning shift which started at 7:30 am. We opened the doors to the clinic at 8 am, I was literally shaking. We had all our supplies lined up, I had my questions to ask my patients. My first patient set the tone for the day, here is our conversation:
(he was a 75 year old gentleman)
M: "Hello sir, how are you feeling today?'
H: "I'm perfect, thank you."
M: "Have you had a flu shot before?"
H: "Yes, I get one every year."
M: "Have you had any problems? Any aversions?"
H: "No, am I supposed to?" laughing
M: laughing "No, you aren't. Do you have an allergies to latex, eggs, anything?"
H: "Nope."
M: "And are you currently pregnant?"
H: Laughing hysterically "Yeah, pregnant with twins, can't you tell!"
M: "You look fantastic! What's your secret?"
and I stick him while he is still laughing
H: "It's all those old people pills I'm on, they keep the babies small. Hey, are you done all ready? I didn't feel a thing!"

And that's how it went for the rest of the day. I ask all my patients, young, old, male, female, if they were pregnant. It kept them laughing and made it so easy for me. I had such a good time and I knew that I was meant to do this.

A New Level of Tired

2009-10-01T17:13:00.002-05:00

I honestly can't remember being this tired in my life. Not when Liam was a newborn and only sleeping a few hours a night, not when the boys were sick, not ever. This is a different kind of tired. It's the kind of tired that you feel in your bones, the kind of tired that after you sleep for 8 straight, blissful hours, you wake in an exhausted state. This is mental exhaustion and it sucks.

I remember the days of newborns and sleep deprivation. Liam would wake at 3:00 am and stay up until 5 am, I would go back to bed and an hour later Aiden would get up for the day. I remember that Chad and I would split the sleeping schedule, some nights I'd go to bed at 6 pm just so I could catch up on sleep. Even with those memories fixed in my head, I can say truly, I am more tired than that.

My life is hectic and over-scheduled. I average about 3 tests per week, which means I live in a state of perpetual studying. I am getting cramps in my hands from writing out note cards. Nursing school is grueling, it has maxed my thinking capacity and I have been forgetting to do key things in my life, like pay bills. You don't even want to see my house, it's gross! I am seriously considering getting a maid.

I know I am ranting and I know that I chose to do this, it is just so much harder than I thought it would be. I'm off to study some more, I have had my allotted break.

I'm not dead

2009-09-17T12:24:00.002-05:00

I know, I know... I don't call, I don't write. What a crappy friend I am. I'm just figured I'd drop you all a line, let you know that I haven't fallen of the face of the Earth. Some day soon I will catch up on blogs and emails, phone calls and forum chit chat. For now, I am so busy...I am so tired, I just don't have it in me. Please forgive me.

I knew this would happen.

2009-08-30T08:15:00.002-05:00

Once again, this is the house of ill!

We were just settling into this new routine. It was Wednesday afternoon, I had just gotten out of lab and had planned on eating lunch and working on some homework. The phone rings, it's Aiden's school. "Mrs. Peterson, this is Tina the school nurse. We have Aiden here, he has a temperature of 100.3*, you'll have to pick him up. By the way, since his fever is over 100* he isn't allowed to come to school tomorrow." OH BOY!

I went to pick him up, then we went to go get Liam together. Aiden was acting fine. He had a cough, but he was active and joking around. We got home and I checked his temp, it was normal. It didn't really matter what his temp was, he had to stay home on Thursday, my only free day from school. By the end of the night Liam had the cough too, I kept them both home on Thursday. Needless to say, I got nothing accomplish on my homework day.

The boys were supposed to be going with Chad out of town. Since they were supposed to leave on Thursday night, I decided to take the kids to the doctor and make sure nothing was seriously wrong with them. Our appointment was at 2:30. We go in, see the doctor, she says that Aiden has the beginnings of an ear infection and a cold. She says that Liam has a the beginnings of a cold and basically gives him a clean bill of health. She prescribes Aiden meds, none for Liam.

I told Chad that he and the boys were good to go on their trip. I packed them up and sent them on their way. By 7:30 that night, it was clear that Liam was not OK. He was coughing so hard that he was gagging himself. He had so much drainage that he was puking mucous. Chad was freaking out because he had never cared for the children (while they were sick) on his own.

Liam ended up in urgent care. They had to put him on a nebulizer, they took x-rays and listen to his chest. He has pneumonia. How in the world did our doctor miss this?! If he had pneumonia at 7:30pm then he most certainly had it a 2:30 when I took him to see the doctor! Unacceptable!

I'm glad that the boys were close enough to come home. I happy to report that Liam is feeling better. Both boys still have yucky sounding (that's a medical term) coughs. Man, steriods crack Liam out. He runs around here like a freaking maniac!

As for what I knew would happen...I can't be around two small sick children and coughed on in the face without getting sick myself. I now have a sore throat and massive drainage, I just can't afford to be sick. I can't miss school and I won't, it's just gonna suck to be in class all day tomorrow feeling like I've been hit with a mack truck.

Good times.

That which doesn't kill us...

2009-08-23T07:54:00.002-05:00

I'm scared. I start school tomorrow and after orientation on Friday, I am completely freaked out. I have this oh-shit-what-did-I-get-myself-into feeling. I spent those 3.5 hours getting excited about finally doing something that I think I'll love, then becoming mortified! This is it. What if I fail?!

More than one professor took the opportunity to tell us that this program is harder in many ways than the graduate program at the school, if you survive it you can easily get your masters afterward...great. Then, they actually did the look to the left of you, look to the right of you, one of the two of you won't make it all the way to the end thing. Ugh! No wonder there is a nursing shortage in this country, if only half of them make it through the program, that means that there will only be 32 in my graduating class.

After the all too scary and real orientation, I went to go purchase my books for this semester, hold onto your hats people... I needed 14 books! Now, ask me how much that cost...$1000!!!! I also bought my first stethoscope (also required), I love the thing!! It is super cool, all black ( I bought the stealth edition) it was $117. Then I had to buy my scrubs and lab coat, another $150. Plus, some ugly ass white leather nursing shoes. This semester is killing my bank account!

*********************************************************************************
Aiden started the 1st grade last week. I cannot believe that he is so big! He seems to like school this year, his teacher is very young (I think that she might be 24), Aiden thinks that she is "hot", his words, not mine! The only thing that Aiden has really said about school at all is that "it's long" (last year kindergarten was 1/2 days).

With me in school in full-time, Liam has started full-time preschool. I'm very proud of him. He is back in the school that he and Aiden went to this summer. He has taken to full-time preschool very well, better than I had expected.

Now, if I could just get over the guilt of not spending every single second with my kids, life would be great. It's quite silly to feel guilty about this but, I do.

So, yeah...

2009-07-24T09:35:00.001-05:00

To say that I have been busy these past few weeks would be a gross understatement. We have had a lot of stuff going here, I don't even know where to start. I suppose I should start with Aiden's 6th birthday (I'm such a bad mom, I should have written about this last week).

Last Saturday was Aiden's birthday. My baby turned 6, I cannot believe it! We opted to have a small party with just a few of Aiden's friends. Aiden wanted to see a movie, so we took 5 boys to see Transformers 2: Revenge of the Fallen. Before you all flog me for the movie choice, I spoke to each one of the boys parents and they all consented to the movie choice. At first, I thought that taking 5 kids to a movie would be madness. I prepared mentally for insanity, however, these boys were so good!!! Everyone went to the restroom before the movie, everyone sat down together, everyone shared the snacks. Not one child got up to pee during the movie, not one got antsy, none of them said a peep during the entire 2 hours and 30 minutes. They were entirely sucked into the movie.

We got back from the movie and had cake and ice cream, then we opened presents. Here are a couple of pics from the day:

My little sister Elise came into town for Aiden's birthday and stayed the week with me. I wish that we would have picked a better week for her to stay with me. She comes to visit one week out the summer every year. We plan these visits months in advance. I didn't realize at the time that I would be in school over the summer, or worse, that I would have finals the week she was here. We made the most of her visit. We had a lot of fun (when I wasn't knee deep in books). I took her shopping, we went out for coffee and she helped me study for my Philosophy final. She left yesterday and I miss her already. The good news is, I'm going to visit her in Chicago in August, YAY!

This week was finals week. Taking 9 hours in the summer is just a BAD idea. Not that I can't handle it, but wow, it's a lot of stress. I feel good about my exams, at least I know I passed all my classes. I'm glad to be done, I really, really need a break.

Of course, my stress level was not helped at all by Liam's surgery, which was scheduled the day after my finals. We had to be at the hospital at 5:30 AM. They checked us in and had us back in a room by 5:45. They got Liam assessed, changed and ready to go by 6:30 and he was wheeled off to surgery by ten til 7. At 7:20 the Dr came back to the room and told us that he was in recovery and everything had gone well. 20 minutes later he was out of recovery and back in the room with me and Chad. It was over so fast, it's hard to wrap your brain around it. It took them less time to extract body parts from my son than it took me to complete my Statistics final the day before.

We were back at the house by 9:45 AM. And Liam, you'd never know anything had happened to him at all. He has been running around here just like before. If it were an adult, we'd be whining and crying in bed. Not him. We haven't even given him his pain medication.

I guess that sums up the past couple of weeks, I know there is more...*shrug* I just can't recall it.

Conflicting Emotions

2009-07-14T06:40:00.003-05:00

On one side of the emotional spectrum:
I love my kids. I have spent every single day with them (minus a vacation or two) since they were born. I have been a stay at home mom for more than 6 years and I have loved it.

On the other side of the emotional spectrum:
I love my kids. They are driving me completely insane. They are constantly getting on each others nerves, fighting and pushing one another's buttons and in turn, pushing mine.

The thing is, in a month, everything is going to change. Everything. I'm not quite sure how I feel about it.

I start nursing school on Aug 24. I will be in school from 7 am until 4 pm, roughly. Aiden will be in first grade, so he'll be in school full-time and Liam, we decided to keep him in preschool where is going now. So, Liam will be in preschool full-time too.

So, on the one hand, the kids have been driving me insane with their fighting. One the other, I am about to go the way of the working mom and only get to spend a few hours a day with my kids. Part me is devastated that I will not be their sole care provider and part of me can't wait to have a little bit of separation from them.

It's actually a very powerful emotional conflict. And, honestly, if they weren't picking on each other so much right now, I think that I would be having an even harder time with leaving them for most of the day.

Generally speaking, I like change. I think that having new and fun things to do is exciting. I am excited about nursing school, leaving the kids is just such a huge change...it feels almost wrong.

I know the kids will be fine, they'll handle this better than I will. I will miss hanging out with my kids all day and taking them where ever and doing what ever we want. At the same time, I know that I'll appreciate the time we get together that much more, now that my time will be so limited.

One more month of fun.

An Award

2009-07-07T12:51:00.002-05:00

My friend Helena gave me an award for my blog and in turn I am supposed to write 10 truths about myself. Despite my chatty nature, I really don't like to talk about myself. This, my friends, should be interesting.

1. I absolutely cannot stand living in Missouri, but I don't like to bring it up with Chad because he is so happy at his job.

2. I am a perfectionist, but since I never have time to do anything the "right way", nothing really ever gets done.

3. Even though I know that having two children is my limit, I am sometimes sad that I will never have a daughter.

4. I have an eating disorder.

5. I worry that I am going to go through years of school and find that I hate being a nurse.

6. I am so swamped at school all the time, I feel like my kids are neglected by me. They aren't deprived of physical needs or anything like that, just time. I know people say quality time, not quantity... still, it makes me feel like a bad mother.

7. My parents marriage makes absolutely no sense to me. I wish they would get a divorce and stop making everyone around them miserable.

8. My little sister is my closest friend.

9. I love to read. Like to the point that it could be called an addiction. I re-read almost every book I buy, to give you an example, I have read the Harry Potter series 8 times through. I have also read my favorites of the series 10 or 12 times each.

10. I love my husband and children so much that I often put myself at the very bottom of my list. I often wonder if I make it to the top of any.

Well, there you have it. A window into my soul, as it were.
I would like to share this award with some people that haven't been picked yet:
1. Kristen at Whats up with the Jones's?
2. Sara at Simply Sara
3. Jenni at My So Cal Life
And two that have, just to make sure that they do it:
4. Cristina at HomeSlice
5. Chrissi at Chrissi's World

Oh the Drama!

2009-06-29T12:41:00.002-05:00

And for a nice change of pace, the drama didn't come from my side of the family! HA!

We meet up with Chad's family once a year at the Lake of the Ozarks, it always nice to go and hang out on the boat, get some sun and swim. We don't get to spend as much time with Chad's side as my side, so these weekends are nice for the kids and grandparents to get some one on one time with them and their Uncle Brink (Chad's brother) and Aunt Nikki (Chad's sister).

We got there on Friday night, everyone was in good form and happy to be there. The boys are just nuts about their Uncle Brink (as he is 14 and still just a kid himself). Brink is great with the kids, the three of them were goofing off instantly. Needless to say, the boys stayed up late hanging out together.

Saturday, we all got up early so we could headed out for a day of fun in the sun (forget that with the heat index it was near 110* outside). We donned some sunscreen, filled the coolers and we were on our way. There is a state park we like to swim at called Ha Ha Tonka. It is a natural spring and the water is much cooler down that way.

We were having a great time when Brink began acting his age (I did mention that he is 14). He made his mother angry and she made him go sit on the boat while the rest of us continued having a good time. He was up there stewing when his mom told him he could come back because the kids wanted to play with him. He began using some expletives that are not meant for polite company and certainly not appropriate for 3.5 & 5 year olds to be around. His mother promptly took away all cell phone privileges. That was that, or so we thought.

We packed up to leave and headed over to get gas for the boat. Brink was still being an angst-ridden teenager, pouting in the corner. I believe he mumbled something about his mother being a "fucking bitch" and that's when things get crazy.

Brink is bigger than his mother but not his father. His father got into his face saying that he was not allowed to disrespect his mother in that way, yelling ensued. (we were still at the gas station) and Brink grabbed his shoes and promptly jumped off the boat. Chad decided it was best that he went after Brink, seeing as Jeff was IRATE. (it's important to point out that Chad did not grab his shoes and it is 110* degrees)

Chad caught up to his brother, he asked him "Hey, do you even know where you are or where you are going?" Brink pushed him away, enough to make Chad stumble and Brink took off running. Chad's feet were blistering on the super hot concrete, he came back to the boat.

We pulled the boat around and docked. Grace, Nikki, Jeff and Chad went looking for Brink. I stayed behind in the boat with the kids in case Brink came back. They looked for a long time, no one found him. Nikki and I had decided to go call the police when Brink came back on his own. For a moment or two I really thought that Jeff was going to punch Brink. Nothing happened.

It was a silent and tense hour ride back to the cabin. My kids were very confused and kept telling Brink that he should say sorry. It is frustrating to have something like this happen in front of your kids, the explanations are tough, it's hard to keep it simple and make them understand.

Once we were back, everyone did their best to make it seem as normal as possible. By the next morning everything was fine. We packed up, said our goodbyes and headed home.

This episode made me happy that my kids are not yet teens. It also made me realize that even though I don't have girls, my road to teen-hood will not be paved in roses. For all those people who said that boys are harder in the beginning and girls are harder as teens...I don't know if I agree with that. It's pretty difficult to assert your authority to a kid that towers over you in height and weight (as witnessed this weekend).

It's a good thing I don't have to think about it for 6.5 more years!

Speech Therapy?

2009-06-25T12:56:00.002-05:00

When we took Liam to the doctor for his latest ear infection (I really wish they would just give us antibiotics by the gallon so we could stop going to the doctor) the doctor said something that took me by surprise. He thinks that Liam needs speech therapy.

Why did this take me aback? Well, he sounds like a "normal" 3.5 year old. The ped said that he thought that Liam speaks like he has gravel in his mouth. OK, I know I am just his biased mother, however, I just don't hear it. I asked Chad, he said that Liam speaks no differently than Aiden did when he was Liam's age.

I figured that both Chad and I could have learned to understand him because we are around him all the time. So, this morning, I asked Liam's new teacher if she had any trouble understanding him. She said that she thought that he was pretty well spoken for a child his age and has never had any trouble understanding him. Hmmmmmm.

The ped was adamant that Liam come back after his surgery. He said that we should hear an immediate improvement in his speech. If we/he doesn't when we bring him in, it will be speech therapy for Liam. Great. Another thing to worry about.

Here's hoping for the best!

Ear Infections, Adenoids & Tubes....Oh My...

2009-06-22T15:38:00.002-05:00

My poor little Liam has been fighting a losing battle for the past six months. This child cannot seem to get rid of his ear infection. At first, I thought he was getting sick from me putting him into Preschool but, most kids develop an immunity after being around the same kids and same germs.

We went round and round. He'd get an ear infection, we'd go to the doctor, they would put him on antibiotics, we'd go back for a follow up...and the infection would still be there!! We'd go on round 2 of antibiotics and so on.

Every few weeks we were at the doctors office. I couldn't understand why this was happening now, he's 3.5 years old. He never had a single ear infection as an infant. Finally, two weeks ago, we were at the doctors office for yet another ear infection (number 5 since January), when the doctor sent us to an ENT.

While I was talking to the ENT (who was freaking awesome by the way), she said my question about why this was happening now instead of when he was younger was exactly why she suspected that Liam's adenoids are too big for his little head. They took some X-rays and low and behold, his adenoids were gia-normous!

The ENT thinks that Liam has been living in a perpetual cycle. There is fluid in his ears that his adenoids are blocking from draining. The fluid becomes infected and therefore extremely painful, his hearing gets clouded. The antibiotics will take care of the infection but, that doesn't matter because the fluid stays put leaving a perfect breeding ground for further infection.

The child is so used to his ears hurting that he doesn't even complain about the pain. He is already showing signs of another infection (runny nose, coughing, ear tugging). He hasn't said a word.

I'm happy to report that, while you never want your kids to have surgery, he will be having his adenoids out at the end of next month. They put tubes in to drain the fluid and take his adenoids out to make sure that the problem doesn't come back. I'm just happy he'll have some relief (and I'll get some too...he doesn't sleep well while infected).

So, now all I have to do is reschedule my Stats final so I am there for the monkey and all will be well!

What's Going On?

2009-06-06T22:16:00.003-05:00

This is one of those posts that really should be bullet points but, it won't be :)

I survived my first week of the Summer semester, that is saying something. Summer semester is intense because you pack 16 weeks into 8. Yeah, fun! I am taking a full load by Summer standards and I have a feeling it is going to kick my ass. I'm taking Statistics, which is proving easier than I thought (but after that last killer math class I'm pretty sure I could balance the national budget and not even break a sweat), Philosophy and Economics.

Econ makes me want to pull my eyelashes out, one by one. I despise it, it is dry and boring. However, I will kick it's ass because that is what I do. Philosophy is more interesting than I gave it credit for. I think part of it is because of the Professor, he makes it fun and I get to argue...we all know how much I like to do that. I think that I will indeed survive the whole semester. I am looking forward to a blissful month off...July 24th can't get here fast enough!

Let's see, what else... Oh, Aiden has finished kindergarten. He is so big, in just a few weeks he will be 6 (he is 6 going on 25 already though). Over the summer, both boys are going to the Child Development Center on my campus. They absolutely LOVE it. Liam actually cried because he had to leave. He didn't really care for his preschool that much, so I was worried about this...however, he seems to love it. In fact, he has taken to it so well, I am enrolling him there for my fall semester despite my switching schools. Which finally lays to rest the nanny vs preschool debate in our house. We had a lot of trouble deciding what route to take on that.

I know that there is other, more interesting things going on here...I just can't think of any of them right now. It's late and I'm tired. OH! for those of you who might be wondering, Chad's hair is growing back nicely, LOL... A week, maybe two, he'll look like his old self again. Next hair cut will have to be supervised a little more closely I think. Hehehehe!

Life Before Chad

2009-05-30T22:15:00.001-05:00

It's strange, but yes, I had a life before Chad. Sometimes it's hard to remember anything before him, he has been my past, present and future for 13 years of my 31 year old life. Today, those memories came to me in a flood when a huge part of my life friended me on facebook.

I was 16 when we met and he was 20. A friend of a friends boyfriend (did you follow that?), we were thrown into each others company because of circumstance and hit it off right away. At first glance we were complete opposites. He was introverted and I was an extravert, he was a loner and I was always surrounded. We found common ground in music and found that the more we talked the more similarities we had.

I fell in love with him instantly. I spent all of my free time with him. I watched him play hockey, he came to my work while I waited tables, we were sick to watch. He was the first man to tell me that they loved me and mean it. He fit in with my family and I with his. My parents let me take trips with him, they trusted him (man, they were stupid).

For more than a year he made me happy. I thought that I would never love anyone as much as I loved him (naïve girl). So, color me surprised when in one day, I fell out of love with him just as quick as I fell in love with him. I remember it as if it were yesterday:

My biological father was trying to play some role in my life at the time, he didn't approve of the age difference and wanted to meet him. We went to dinner at Bob's house. Bob and J hit it off immediately. They laughed the same, talked the same, they smoked the same cigarettes, they were the same person. It was that moment at nearly 18 years old, that I knew that J would never, could never be the man that I would need in my life. He would be Bob. And even if he could be a faithful husband (something that Bob never managed to do), he would never be the husband that I would want or need in my life. He was too much like Bob. We broke up shortly after this night.

It has been 14 years since I have seen or talked to J. You can imagine my surprise when I checked my email this morning and I have a friend request from him. I think I stared at it for 5 solid minutes. I have no idea how found me.

We chatted for a few minutes today. He is married and has a daughter, he seems very happy. I truly hope that he is. I never wished anything but good things for him. It's just weird talking to him, I'd forgotten so much about him, us, me. It seems like a different lifetime, it was a different lifetime.

Hmmmmm, facebook. Can't decide if it's a good thing or a bad thing.

OH! MY! CHAD!

2009-05-25T14:45:00.001-05:00

My husband is easily one of the smartest people I have ever met (don't tell him I said that). The things that he does at work astound me, he is a brilliant man. It's this fact that make his fuck-ups that much funnier!

He has many moments of genius but, for every 4 or 5 brilliant moments he has one enormous laps in common sense. One of my favorite moments of his was one night before we got married, we were Christmas shopping together (this is when we still went Christmas shopping together) and he mused out loud: "How is it that Christmas always falls on a Sunday?" Me:"Ummm, it doesn't. Christmas is December 25." To which he responds "Yeah, how do they make December 25 on a Sunday every year." OOOOOOH boy! My Dad loves that story, he tells it every year at Christmas.

Anyhow, you can see that Chad has his blond moments. I could tell you a ton of them, but I want you to experience the latest one, it's epic!

I was cutting his hair yesterday morning, as I do every two weeks, it's a simple 3 guard all over his head (why pay someone $20 for something so simple). When I finish, Chad goes up stairs and he'll clean up his side burns and goatee. He sets the guard at a 5 and goes to town. Well, this time someone thought they had set guard to a 5...in reality, he has set the guard to a 1. He shaved from his chin all the way up past his temple. Resulting in this lovely look:

Obviously, this didn't leave up many options for his hair, since he had shaved the side of his head bald. So, I fixed it. He looks like a total jarhead now, but it's fixed:

I got a good laugh at his expense yesterday. I hope you did too :)

8 Years Ago Tuesday - Photo Heavy

2009-05-23T12:25:00.001-05:00

Since it's Chad & my 8 year anniversary on Tuesday, I thought that I would FINALLY scan some of our wedding pictures for everyone to see. We really had a beautiful wedding, we look so very young in these pictures. Anyway...here are some for your viewing pleasure.

I can't believe it has been 8 years already.

Rambling

2009-05-21T21:34:00.003-05:00

I go through these weird periods, funks, depressions, whatever you want to call it...sometimes worse than others. Right now, I'm going through a nobody likes me, everybody hates me, I'm gonna go eat worms type thing.

These are generally periods where I feel friendless, like the people who know me are just tolerating me. It's hard to explain. I'd almost call it paranoid.

I think that part of my problem is that I have no close real-life friends. I have friends in my everyday life, just not people that I would share everything with. Most of my true blue friends I met on-line and that's fantastic, they are wonderful people whom I adore but, they all have real-life best friends. They have people in their lives that they have lunch with or have drinks with. I don't. The friends I had, once upon a time (before we moved) are not in the same place in their lives, most of them don't have kids. It's hard to relate to them. Since we have moved here, I have made and lost friends...nothing has really stuck.

Ugh, reading this back makes me feel pathetic.

It's just a funk. An I'm-outta-school-have-to-much-time-on-my-hands-funk. This is what happens when I am free to think about random things, horrible things like: that even my online friends have closer relationships and I'm just trespassing. I think that I'm boring and stupid. I think that I am not good enough.

This is stupid. I will wake up and feel better tomorrow. I'm just rambling.

Sweetness

2009-04-28T20:56:00.003-05:00

Sometimes it's pretty cool being a mom, especially in those rare moments of tenderness between siblings. I have always hoped and will continue to hope that my children will be close. I am lucky in that my little brother and sister are my best friends. We don't always agree (especially my little brother & I), but we are always there for each other.

Tonight, I was putting the minions to bed. We all climbed into Aiden's bed and read a bedtime story (The Three Little Pigs -- The Real Story). It's one of my favorite times of day, we giggle together and make faces at the characters and I do stupid voices. It's fun and part of our daily routine.

After the story the boys are put to bed separately, this is much easier when Chad is home but, he is working late tonight. I told Liam to head to his room and that I would be right there, while I gave Aiden the final I love you's of the night. When I went to turn the light off, Aiden's nightlight didn't come on. CRAP. Aiden hates sleeping in his room without a nightlight.

Aiden & I were discussing options when Liam came back into the room. Liam comes over to me, his nightlight in hand and says "Aiden, you can have mine." Awwwww! Aiden was nearly teary-eyed over it. "Awww, thanks Liam. You can sleep with me if you think you're going to be scared." OK, this is when mom gets teary-eyed, because Aiden HATES it when people sleep with him. He absolutely cannot stand it. Liam say "Yeah, we'll read a book." He goes to get another book, hops into bed with Aiden. Aiden huddles up with Liam and they start reading together. Aiden promptly looks over at me and say "goodnight mom, we'll be fine."

It kind of made me laugh, I saw my dismissle, but I just found the whole thing to be so sweet. I just wanted to keep this memory somewhere. So here it is. A very sweet memory of brotherly love.

My Frustration

2009-04-21T09:55:00.002-05:00

Before I get into what is bothering me, I just wanted to thank my friends for being so supportive and kind while Liam was in the hospital. I was a nervous wreck, it's so nice to know that there are so many people out there that care what happens to my boy.

So, my frustration is with the doctor's office or maybe it's doctors in general. The thing that irritates me is that I know that I will never know what was wrong with my son. They took all the cultures, blood, urine and stool and they are growing the cultures. However, I know that as long as what he has/had is not life threatening, they will never call me and let me know what is/was going on with him. As far as they are concerned, as long as he is on the mend there is no reason to elaborate.

I know this because Liam's pediatrician belongs to the same group of doctors that I belonged to when they found the lump in my breast. The same group of doctors I had to call every single day for two weeks so that they would give me a diagnosis and that's was when there was a diagnosis to give. I think that is ridiculous!

It's this kind behavior from doctors that makes me want to go back to my original plan and become a doctor, a better one. I think that doctors forget that they are in a customer service industry. That the patient can go somewhere else if they aren't satisfied. I feel like a lot of doctors care more about how many patients they can see in a day, then the quality of care that they give. This bugs the crap out of me.

I want to know what happened to my child, I want to know why he alone was ill. Not one of us, aside from Liam, got sick or is getting sick. It makes zero sense. Was it food poisoning? Was something as simple as the rotavirus? I feel like I should be able to have those answers and not have to chase my doctor down to get them. Grrrrr!

Alright, that's my soapbox, I'm getting down now.

By the way, Liam is doing better. He's not 100% and man is he crabby (kid won't eat, that would make anyone crabby). I'm just glad he is home and seemingly more normal every day.

Public Speaking

2009-04-16T15:17:00.002-05:00

Oh, how I hate thee!

This semester I have been taking speech, oh wait, it's not called that anymore! It's Oral Communications. Dude, if looks like a duck, walks like a duck and quacks like a duck, it's a fucking duck. I'm taking Speech. I LOATHE speech class! Which is kind of funny when you think about it, since if you ask anyone who knows me at all, I'll chat your ear off. Ask Cristina, she'll tell you it's hard to get me off the phone.

So, I like to talk, but that is not public speaking. Here's something funnier, if I am sitting in my seat with a bunch a people I don't know and someone says something stupid, I'll call them out. I'll give them my opinion and I will argue with them until they learn that I am right! But that, that is from the comfort of my seat while sitting down...not at the front of the class.

I don't know what it is about giving speeches that makes me a nervous wreck, maybe it's the fear of being judged, rejected, people thinking that your stupid, forgetting your "lines", I could go on. It freaks me out. My face turns red, I get all clammy and feel like I am going to faint.

Normally, on speech night, my school friend and I go out and get a drink before class to calm my very overactive nerves. Here's the hitch in that plan...wait for it...Kristin might have a heart-attack... I have given up drinking (for no other reason in trying to jump start my metabolism, in an effort to lose some weight). So, no liquid courage tonight.

Tonight, the speech I am giving is part of a group presentation, which actually makes me more nervous. WHY? Because, other people are depending on me for their grade. UGH!!!!

I know that what I have written for the speech is solid material, I just hope I can deliver. Wish me luck, I am SO going to need it.

Oh, Pillowbag!

2009-04-03T14:36:00.003-05:00

You guys will like this story.
The other day, while driving to the store, I was cut off by another car. It was a very close call, they nearly clipped my bummer. It freaked me out and in my anxiety I yelled at the top of my lungs, "Watch where you are going! Douchebag!" I knew full well that the other driver could not hear me, what I should have realized was that my kids could. They were sitting in the back seat. Of course, as soon as I said it, I immediately regretted it. I did not want my kids going around calling people douchebags (as funny as it might sound coming out of their little mouths).

Aiden: "What was that word you just said?"
Me: "Me? I didn't say anything." I wouldn't say that lying is the best policy, it's just, you tell a kid that you said a bad word...well, it makes them want to say it all the more.
A: "Yes, you did. You said pillowbag, what does that mean?"
Me: giggling "Pillowbag? I didn't say pillowbag, I promise you that."
A: "Yes you did, MOM! What does it mean?"
Me: "Pillowbag means pillowbag, honestly, I have no idea."
A: "Whatever, I know what you said."

I just giggled. Later that day, Aiden was playing with Liam and Liam took a toy from Aiden. I'm in the kitchen and I hear this agruement:
A: "Liam, that's mine!"
L: "It's mine!"
ripping said toy from hands
A: "Give it back!!!"
L: "NOOO!" running away...
A: "MOOOOOOM! Liam's being a pillowbag!"

Great! Well, atleast he isn't saying douchebag!

Cathching Up & Stuff Like That

2009-03-24T15:29:00.002-05:00

Let's see, where to start?
Chad has been gone nearly three weeks and we have survived! More than that, I learned that I can do this 100% on my own and be OK. Not that I need that information, it's just nice to know that I am stronger than I gave myself credit for.

I had my Spring Break last week, if you really want to call it that. I think I worked as hard, if not harder on homework so that I could be slightly ahead in the coming weeks and feel like I am swimming, instead of drowning. I hope that it works :)

I got my acceptance to UMSL, I am very proud of myself. The only disappointing part was getting the letter while Chad was away. I feel that he has just as much invested in this as I do and it would have been nice to get the results together. Plus, I didn't get to tell him for 3 days, I think... By then, the excitement had worn off just a little and the news came out to him something like "Oh, by the way, I got into UMSL." Oh well.

With that acceptance letter came a lot of crap to do. They sent me lists of things I need to get accomplished before the Fall semester. I have been so busy trying to get everything done that I my head has been spinning. If I'm not with my kids or doing school work, then I am trying to arrange something for UMSL. It's a ton of work, but I'm managing.

I took the kids to my parents house this past weekend, I think 4 full days with my mom is about 2 too many. I was so ready to leave this morning, in fact, I was in such a hurry that I forgot to pick up our Wii controlers and Wii games. Aiden was MAD at me!!! He loves the Wii, so my Dad said he'd mail the controlers and games to us...phew, because if I have to listen to whininess of a near 6 year old for days on end, he may not make it.

I am certain that there is more, but I am super tired. I just thought I'd post something so you all would know I am alive.

Shitastic!

2009-03-09T14:18:00.003-05:00

Yesterday sucked! It had nothing to do with Chad being gone or the kids being bad. It was just a craptacular day (you like my made up words, I know you do)!

First thing yesterday morning, I got a facebook email from a woman I had never met, the subject title was Chad. I was like, who the hell is this and why is she emailing me about my husband?! I check who her friends are, the only friend that she and I have in common is Susan. Okkkkeeeee, why would this chick know who Chad is? She is from Ohio and he is not. I was baffled. I open her email and it says,

"LOL, how do you know Chad? I only know him through Chris's brother Greg who is uber creepy."

WTF?! Who's Chris, who is Greg? And for that matter, who the fuck are you chickie? I decided it was best not to respond like that, so I called Susan to see who she was and if she had Chad mixed up with someone else. After I talked to Susan, I was certain that she had Chad pegged for the wrong person, so I responded to her:

"I'm Chad's wife. I think you might be confused about your Chad's???
How do you know him again?"

To which she responded by biting my head off!

"How do you think that IM the one confused --- we are from OHIO and Chad is NOT married and if u look at the sign it says PERRY COUNTY on it -- So YOU have the wrong Chad NOT ME"

Ummmm, WHAT?! You messaged me lady, I called Susan, told her that her friend is psycho and didn't respond...Bah!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
We went out to run a few errands today, when we were getting back into the car, Aiden smashed Liam's hand in the door. Liam is alright, his little hand was pinched in the door and he lost a little skin and will have a decent bruise tomorrow. Aiden felt awful, he hadn't meant to hurt him (although he shouldn't have slammed the door knowing full well that his brother wanted to get into the car on his side). Liam cried and Aiden did too.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sunday was the windiest day that I can remember, so windy that the chairs were moving on the back porch. So, I shouldn't have been surprised when Dani came knocking on the door to tell me that part of our roofing tiles had been blown off. I guess half the neighborhood has lost tiles! Susan is lending me her husband to fix the damage, because it is March and it likes to rain here in March. If I waited until Chad got home, we might have gotten a leak in the garage.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Oh, Dani had more good news too. They have friends visiting from out of town that were visiting this weekend, they went to get into their car yesterday morning (it had been parked in D & B's driveway) and found that their car had been broken into. Yay! They called the police who informed them that there has been a "rash of burglaries" in our neighborhood, like 7 in
the past two weeks. Great! Now I feel all safe!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
As you can tell, yesterday was super fun! Actually, aside from all that crap, it was a pretty good weekend. The boys played outside (in what felt like 80 mile per hour winds) until 7:30 last night, which is their bedtime. I wanted to wear them out because of DST. They were pooped and even in the bath they were falling asleep. They miss their dad and talk about him all the time. Aiden has drawn him a dozen pictures, I wish I had a scanner so that I could send them to Chad.

We are holding up, I'm not crazy yet, but I'm tired :)

Single Mom-ing it

2009-03-07T16:20:00.002-06:00

Man, I don't know how people do this day after day. Being a single mom or a military mom, I am not cut out for this stuff. It's not that my kids are bad, it's not even like I'm not the primary care giver most of the time anyway. It's just, now I am alone. There is no one here to talk to, there's nothing to break up the day, there is no one to back me up or take over when I am tired. Whiny, I know.

I don't know how single mom's or military mom's do this. This is going to be a long three weeks.

My Mother Strikes Again!

2009-02-23T14:41:00.002-06:00

My mother has some nerve! It wasn't too long ago that she flat out called me white trash for getting a nose piercing and a new tattoo, it was even more recent that she told me that she feels like I am going through some kind of mid-life crisis for going out for my birthday and getting drunk. This time she has crossed a line now, plain and simple.

I kind of have to give a little back story so you'll understand...here we go.
This semester of school has been rough, I constantly feel like I am barely keeping my head above the water. I feel constant pressure, stress and guilt. Why the guilt? I feel like I am not spending enough quality time with my children. They are here, I am here, but I am always so submersed in homework that I barely look up from my computer. They are feeling my absence and so is Chad, he has taken to calling me his weekend wife. Yeah, life is just great.

So, the other day when Chad came home from work to find me at the kitchen table, knee deep in homework, me already feeling guilty his remark of "Well, you are exactly where I thought you'd be. Did you even look at the kids today?" it cut me deep. He immediately said he was joking and could tell that he hurt my feelings. He knows how hard I try to balance it all. But, even with his apology, I felt hurt. When you feel hurt by your husband who do you talk to? I called my mom.

Oops, my mistake. Rather than getting the support I needed, I got her. She, in no uncertain terms, agreed with Chad's remark and for all intents and purposes, called me a horrible mother. Her exact words allude me now, because I was shocked and angry, so I shall paraphrase for you.
"Jessi (she calls me Jessi, yeah...I'm 10), I wasn't going to say anything to you about this (which means she has already been talking behind my back to one of my siblings about it). When I was at your house over the weekend, well, I noticed how much time you spend doing your homework. You know your kids are going to suffer from this. I don't know if they'll recover from this kind of abandonment (ARE YOU KIDDING ME! Ummm, I recovered from my birth father actually leaving...WTF). I know that they think that you are rejecting them, you let them watch too much tv now, it's like you don't really care about there well-being, just good grades. Maybe you should forego the gym and spend more time at home spending real time with your children."

You can imagine that I was shocked. I flat out asked her what the hell I was supposed to do? I have to get this shit done. Does she actually think that I don't want to spend time with my kids? Does she think that I actually prefer homework to them?! She said "I think that right now, your priorities are just a little bit mixed up. I don't mean to upset you, maybe you should manage your time better." K! Because, I'm not doing the best I can....

You know the worst part? She got to me. I feel like a terrible mother, I feel awful for even taking the time to type this out. I will make it my goal in life to never turn into my mother. I hope I can be a loving and supportive mother to my boys. I hope that when they need me to pull them up that I will be there first in line. I know that if my kids were doing something to better their life and the life of their family, that I would be there in the front row to cheer them on!!! I will never be my mother, my children deserve better.

Plunging it for a good cause

2009-02-08T08:06:00.001-06:00

I did it! I survived the Polar Bear Plunge for Missouri Special Olympics! I don't think we could have had a better day for it. It was a balmy 67*, which is quite a turn around from the previous week of subzero temperatures, I think it got up to 20* last week.

Susan & I carpooled, which was smart, because there was very little parking! I was surprised at unorganized the event was, considering how long they have been putting it on. It was pretty much mass chaos.

We parked about a mile away and hoofed it to the clubhouse where we were to meet the rest of our team. We only got a short ways before Susan realized she left her orange wrist band in the car, you can't jump without it...maybe she had a Freudian slip there?
Here she is running back to the car to get it.

Once we got to the clubhouse, we met up with the rest of ~~the crazies~~ our team. I couldn't believe that my friend Heather actually showed up, she has strep throat! Here's a pic of her drinking her bloody mary, trying to get herself psyched.

Here's Susan drinking a beer, I think we all needed a little alcohol to convince ourselves that this was a good idea.

Some people really went all out. There were tons of costumes, apparently, there is a costume contest before the plunge. I wish could have gotten pictures of everyone. I saw people dressed as The Beatles ala Sergeant Pepper's, a group dressed as Kiss, there was a Slash, Ozzy Osbourne, the Incredible Hulk, Superman...you get the idea. Here are the few pictures I got of those people.

After the parade of costumes, it was time to plunge. I must admit that I kind of started to freak out, yeah it's 67* outside, but the water... well, they had to clear off the ice from the water so we could jump. BRRRRR!

Our group was in heat 10. Each heat seemed to be taking about a minute, so there wasn't much time to think about what we were doing. We all just got in line and waited. I wish I got pictures of us jumping, but as my entire group was in the same heat, none of us could take pictures. I am hoping that Shanna's daughter got some pictures of us.

Then it was our turn, we lined up on the beach as they called each of our names. The guy over the speaker says "Put your hand up when you are ready." I was like, well, I'll put my hand up, but I am never going to be ready. Then it was 3.....2....1....PLUNGE! I ran and dove into the water! IT WAS FUCKING COLD! There is no nice way to say it! The water temperature was 34*! That's fucking cold! I think I screamed.

Once I got out of the water though, you'd have thought it was 90* outside, everything seemed warmer. Our group was interviewed for the news, because Heather decided to jump on the back of one of our other team members in order to dunk her. It was hilarious.

We all looked like a bunch of wet rats once out of the water.

Next year, I think we should dress up! It adds a little something to it! Yeah, you heard me right, I will be plunging again. We had a great time and it is for a great cause. Our group raised a lot of money for the Special Olympics, next year, I'll be hitting up my friends for donations ;P

Apparently, I'm Unbalanced...

2009-02-03T12:09:00.002-06:00

...or something like that.

Let me start at the beginning, this might get kind of long, so I apologize in advance.

When I got back from Richmond, I was in a funk. I think that Cristina put it best, a post girlfriend depression. At first, I told myself that I was just upset because my birthday was coming up, but I knew that wasn't really the reason. I guess it was more that it gets kind of hard knowing that your best friends are spread all over the world. Being back home was kind of rough. You might be thinking, why? But, there is some logic here, I assure you.

You see, I have made friends here in the past year or so (it only took me 4.5 years), but they are the kind of friends you hang and have drinks with, not the friends you cry to or confide in. The only real friend I had here like that was Dani. As many of you know, I can no longer stand her. She has made a mockery of our friendship and abused it to the breaking point. So, yeah...I was sad to come home to that. Knowing that most of my free girlfriend time would be spent with someone I can't stand. Why not cut her out of my life? Logical question. Her husband and my husband are best friends, oh...did I mention they live next door? Fun!

I am sure you can see why I had kind a little funk going on. Well, my mother was in touch with me while all this was going on. She was already "concerned" about my new tattoo and nose piercing. This funk apparently added fuel to her already blazing fire about the current state of my sanity.

Cut to this weekend. On Friday, the girlfriends I have acquired decided that we needed to go our an celebrate my old age. We went out and I tied one on! I cannot recall being that drunk or that hungover in many, many moons. When my mother called this weekend just to check in, Chad told her that I was praising the porcelain god. She thought I was sick at first, then Chad explained about the birthday party.

I called her back, once I felt up to it. She was giving me some crap about the hangover and what not when this comes blurting out of her mouth:

Mom: "Jess, your sister and I are worried about you."

Me: "Why?"

Mom: "She thinks that you are depressed. She thinks that you are trying to find yourself, by going out with these new women all the time. That you are unbalanced, maybe you are going through some kind of mid-life crisis. I mean, why else would you run off and get a new tattoo and nose piercing at your age."

Me: "What on earth are you talking about?!"

Mom: "You know it's OK if you are, I am sure Chad can find the right help for you, but this behavior has got to stop. You have two children and a husband to look after."

At this point I think I am in a 50's time warp or the Twilight Zone

Me: "Ummm, Mom. I have absolutely no response to that. I think I am going to go. I'll talk to you later."

After we hang up, I talk to Chad, who laughs hysterically at the whole conversation. I can't help but shake my head. I sent a text to my sister, I talk to the girl everyday, if she thought I need some kind of help, one would think she would have mentioned something in one of the millions of phone conversations we've have recently. She was totally at a loss and laughed at my mother as well.

I think she might be the unbalanced one, but I guess if I am unbalanced, I wouldn't know it would I. Whatever.

100 Things

2009-01-27T07:45:00.001-06:00

Stolen from Alicia, because I am bored at home with one sick kid and one that is out of school because of the weather.

Put the ones you've done in bold.
1. Started your own blog
2. Slept under the stars
3. Played in a band
4. Visited Hawaii
5. Watched a meteor shower
6. Given more than you can afford to charity
7. Been to Disneyland
8. Climbed a mountain
9. Held a praying mantis
10. Sang a solo
11. Bungee jumped
12. Visited Paris
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea
14. Taught yourself an art from scratch
15. Adopted a child
16. Had food poisoning
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty
18. Grown your own vegetables
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France
20. Slept on an overnight train
21. Had a pillow fight
22. Hitch hiked
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill
24. Built a snow fort
25. Held a lamb
26. Gone skinny dipping
27. Run a Marathon
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice
29. Seen a total eclipse
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset
31. Hit a home run
32. Been on a cruise
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors
35. Seen an Amish community
36. Taught yourself a new language
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone rock climbing
40. Seen Michelangelos David
41. Sung karaoke
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant
44. Visited Africa
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight
46. Been transported in an ambulance
47. Had your portrait painted
48. Gone deep sea fishing
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling
52. Kissed in the rain
53. Played in the mud
54. Gone to a drive-in theater
55. Been in a movie
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business
58. Taken a martial arts class
59. Visited Russia
60. Served at a soup kitchen
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies
62. Gone whale watching
63. Got flowers for no reason
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma
65. Gone sky diving
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp
67. Bounced a check
68. Flown in a helicopter
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial
71. Eaten Caviar
72. Pieced a quilt
73. Stood in Times Square
74. Toured the Everglades
75. Been fired from a job
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London
77. Broken a bone
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person
80. Published a book
81. Visited the Vatican
82. Bought a brand new car
83. Walked in Jerusalem
84. Had your picture in the newspaper
85. Read the entire Bible
86. Visited the White House
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
88. Had chickenpox
89. Saved someone’s life
90. Sat on a jury
91. Met someone famous
92. Joined a book club
93. Lost a loved one
94. Had a baby
95. Seen the Alamo in person
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake
97. Been involved in a law suit
98. Owned a cell phone
99. Been stung by a bee
100. Read an entire book in one day

The Richmond Recap

2009-01-18T15:34:00.001-06:00

I am really, really tired, so this will be a lot more pictures and not a lot of talk. We had a great time, I mean, how could we not! I just can't believe it is already over and that I am back home with the kids already...too fast!

I got to Cristina's house on Thursday night, in my mission to find her in the airport, I walked right by her...that is so me! We got to spend just a little bit of time together, just the two of us, eating queso dip and watching Grey's Anatomy.

Friday morning, we went to pick up Sara! We picked her up and she told us that she hadn't slept a wink in 24 hours! She was exhausted, but that didn't stop her from going out to lunch with us!

Here's Cristina at lunch comparing our iphones

Next we picked up Annita, who was exactly how I thought she would be. She was hilarious and her accent makes almost anything she says sound dirty. LOL! Then, we picked Helena up, none of us was 100% sure what she looked like, so we looked her photo up before I went into the airport to track her down. Last, but not least, we picked Alicia up from the train station. She had been delayed more than an hour due to train difficulties. BOOOO!

After we had everyone, we went back to Cristina's house to make some cheese fondue and chocolate fondue! It was delicious! Here are pics of us preparing fondue.

Sara probably should not have been wielding a knife after being up for so long :)

Annita cutting pineapple

Helena watching the action

A double fisted Sara!

The next day we went to a diner (Silver Diner? Maybe? not 100% on the name) for some yummy breakfast and group silliness!

After breakfast we all went to River City Tattoo so that Alicia, Sara and I could maim ourselves :P

This is the girl who pierced Sara and my nose. (Cristina has many more pictures of all this stuff)

After the maiming, we went to Cary Town to go shopping, which was very fun. There were a lot of fun and unique shops there. I managed to find Chad a Tibetan singing bowl and a couple of cute gifts for the boys.

Later that evening, we went to Joe's Inn to eat dinner. I can't accurately put into words how big the portions of food were. It was like being served family style...except it was all for you.

Waiting for a table at Joe's:

Once we got back to Cristina's we settled in for some lively chatting a some SNL funny. Except SNL wasn't that funny, but the chatting was very fun!

A freezing Annita

Comfy Alicia

Watching SNL

I had such a good time spending time with these women. It's good to know that our friendship is just as real in person as it is online. I miss them all ready!

2008 in Review

2009-01-01T17:10:00.001-06:00

Seriously? I cannot believe how fast 2008 went! I remember when I was a kid and my parents would tell me that once you get older, time seemed to pass you by. I never believed them, time always seemed to go by so slowly when I was young. I swear though, this year went by in a blink.

2008 was full of milestones for me and my family, I think it will be good to try and write some of those down. Here's my 2008 in review.

January: Ugh, I started of the year with a bang! I turned 30 and was miserable about it. I cried about turning 30, which was stupid, it's just another year. I guess I was disappointed that I hadn't accomplished all that I had wanted to by time I hit the rip old age of the big 3-0.

March: My grandmother died. It was a blow to my family, especially my dad. She was a wonderful woman and she has been sorely missed.

April: I met my online friends in Las Vegas. I can't even put into words how much that one experience means to me. It was so great spending time with these women that had become a source of support and love to me. This was probably one of my favorite things that happened in '08!

May: This month marked my 7th year of marriage and 12th year of being with Chad. In some ways it seems longer and in others it seems shorter.

July: My father turns 60 & Aiden turned 5!

August: We went on our family vacation to North Carolina, where I spent a week with my biological father, his brother and his family. This was the first time I spent anytime with Bob in years, to my surprise, he was not so bad to be around. My aunt, uncle and cousins were a blast to hang out with and I hope to see them again soon... not the 7 years between visits it was this time.

Then, the biggest milestone of all! Aiden started Kindergarten. I still can't believe that my baby is old enough to be a kindergartner! He's so big!

September: I finally got to meet Jenni! I had 3 full days to hang out with one of the greatest people I have ever met! We laughed and drank and had a great time. I will come see you at your place Jenn, I promise!

October: Hmmm, let's see... October held a lot of regret for me. I was busy kicking myself in the ass for school things past. Plus, my mom got sick and we went to the most boring wedding on the face of the planet. Nothing exciting there.

November: Thanksgiving sucked, enough said.

December: Liam turned 3. This was a happy and sad moment. It didn't seem possible that my youngest was no longer a baby anymore, he is a big boy with a whole lot of attitude :P

I guess that sums it up. Time sure does fly. I am looking forward to 2009 and all the new milestones it brings!

Happy New Year Everyone!

Recap: The Christmas Edition

2008-12-29T09:47:00.001-06:00

We here at the Peterson household had a very nice, very low key Christmas. It all starts on Christmas Eve, the boys and I spend a few hours in the kitchen making homemade cookies for Santa. I wish I would have taken pictures of them, up to their elbows in cookie dough, eating more dough than they should. Very cute.

That night we sat out our milk and cookies on a tray next to the fireplace and wrote Santa a letter. Then we ushered them upstairs and read "The Night Before Christmas". Chad & I then gave them a little talk about not getting out of bed before morning, otherwise Santa won't come visit. Surprisingly enough, they complied.

Christmas morning was sort of ironic. Liam is always, always, the first person up in the house. He never sleeps in. Unless, I guess, it is Christmas morning. Aiden was up at 6:30, Chad & I got up as soon as we heard him. The three of us had to wait until 7:15 for Liam to mosey down the stairs. Aiden was very patient, we let him open all his stocking stuff while waiting on Liam.

Once Liam decided to join us, Aiden could hardly contain himself. He was so excited to see if Santa got him everything on his list. Santa did not disappoint. These kids are so dang spoiled!

About 1/2 way through opening presents, Liam got bored and quit. He was more interested in the candy that Santa had left in his stocking. Go figure.

After all the Christmas presents were opened, we had cinnamon rolls and hot chocolate for breakfast. We had round two of present opening when our neighbors came over. Again, Liam got bored and didn't finish opening his gifts... he's strange.

It was a nice Christmas, I think everyone got what they wanted. The kids have been playing no stop with all their new toys. I hope you all had wonderful Christmases and Happy New Years!

You know I Love a Good Meme!

2008-12-12T20:25:00.001-06:00

One Word
Where is your mobile phone? lap
Where is your significant other? computer
Your hair color? red
Your mother? interesting
Your father? gone
Your favorite thing? family
Your dream last night? shrug
Your dream goal? travel
Room You’re In? family
Your hobby? reading
Your fear? snakes
Where do you want to be in 6 years? moved
Where were you last night? bed
What you’re not? intoxicated
Where you grew up? away
The last thing you did? bake
What are you wearing? shirt
Your TV? big
Your pets? Mark
Your computer? Dell
Your mood? whatever
Missing someone? Yes.
Your car? Mazda
Something you’re not wearing? watch
Favorite shop? book
Your summer? HOT
Love someone? Yes.
Your favorite color? red
When is the last time you laughed? earlier

Firsts Meme
1. Who was your FIRST prom date?
Chris
2. What was your FIRST alcoholic drink? Wine cooler
3. What was your FIRST job? Sacker at the grocery store
4. What was your FIRST car?
1986 Dodge 600 convertable.
5. Who was the FIRST person to text you today?
Dani
6. Who is the FIRST person you thought of this morning?
Liam
7. Who was your FIRST grade teacher?
Mrs. French
8. Where did you go on your FIRST ride on an airplane?
Florida
9. Who was your FIRST best friend, and are you still friends with him / her? Summer and no, I don't have a clue what happened to her.
10. Who was your FIRST kiss?
Jason
11. Who was the FIRST person you talked to today?
Liam
12. What was the FIRST thing you did this morning?
Got hit in the head by Liam
13. What was the FIRST concert you ever went to?
New Kids on the Block, yeah! I was 12.
14. What was your FIRST tattoo or piercing?
First piercing - ears - First tattoo - sun - age 18.
15. What was the FIRST foreign country you went to?
Ireland
16. What was the FIRST movie you saw in the theater?
I honestly don't recall
17. When was your FIRST detention?
Sophomore year, ditching will get you in big trouble
18. What was the FIRST state you lived in?
A state of shock
19. Who was the FIRST person to really break your heart?
Jason
20. With whom was your FIRST date?
Joe
21. What was your FIRST pet?
Bernie the dog
22. Who was your FIRST roommate?
Stephanie, she was psychotic
23. Who was your FIRST love?
Jason, again
24. What was your FIRST screen name?
jouet_us
25. When did you have your FIRST baby?
2003

Belated Liam Birthday Post

2008-12-10T09:19:00.002-06:00

I'm a terrible mother. I haven't even said a word about Liam's 3rd Birthday. We have been so busy here Chez Peterson! Not that that's excuse. As birthdays goes, it was pretty uneventful. I still can't believe he is 3, in some ways he seems older and at the same time it seems like yesterday that he was born. Although Liam is a handful, he is a bright, funny, smart little boy. I'm lucky to have him as a son.

Here are some shots from the party.

Liam & Uncle Ryan

Liam & Uncle Brink

The Cake

The only kid who hates the birthday song

Opening Gifts!

Me & My Sister

The In-laws

A Very Unhappy Thanksgiving Charlie Brown!

2008-11-29T12:37:00.002-06:00

I was going to go into all the messy details about how completely awful our Thanksgiving was, but I decided to scrap the idea. Nobody needs to read all that drama. It was a highly charged atmosphere, it is sad that things got so bad. I hate that my children had to see the things that they saw. It was hard to be thankful.

I tell you what I am thankful for, my children and my husband! They are beautiful and I love them.

My New Favorite Song

2008-11-17T16:14:00.001-06:00

I have never been a huge Jason Mraz fan, but I fell in love with this song! Of course, that means I must make you all love it too.

Details in the Fabric - Jason Mraz

Bodyrock - A Music Meme

2008-11-11T14:40:00.001-06:00

I stole this from my sister Elise, only because I didn't do it the last time it went around. Feel free to do it, if you want.
1.Put your iTunes on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS!
4. Tag 10 friends who might enjoy doing the memo as well as the person you got the meme from.

IF SOMEONE SAYS "IS THIS OKAY" YOU SAY?
“Trouble” by Ray LaMontagne

WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY?
“If I could” by Jack Johnson

WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
“MC5” by Stone Temple Pilots

HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?
“Strawberry Fields Forever” by The Beatles

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE?
“The Heart of Life” by John Mayer

WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?
“Baby” by Dave Matthews

WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
“The Blood” by The Frames

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
“Temptation Waits” by Garbage

WHAT IS 2+2?
“Atlanta" by Stone Temple Pilots

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
“Clocks” by Coldplay

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
“Grassroots” by 311

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
“Once” by Glen Hansard & Marketa Irglova

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
“You Don't Know Me” by Michael Buble

WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
“Sexyback” by Justin Timberlake

WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
“What Happens When the Heart Just Stops” by the Frames

WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
“Tragic Kingdom” by No Doubt

WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
“The Sky is Broken” by Moby

WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
“Lie in Our Graves” by Dave Matthews Band

WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
“New Orleans Instrumental No. 1” by R.E.M.

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
“Don't Explain” by Damien Rice & Herbie Hancock

WHAT'S THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN?
“Another Little Hole” by Aqualung

HOW WILL YOU DIE?
“Pink Bullets” by The Shins

WHAT IS THE ONE THING YOU REGRET?
“Little Black Backpack” by Stroke 9

WHAT MAKES YOU LAUGH?
“Flight of the Passing Fancy” by Squirrel Nut Zippers

WHAT MAKES YOU CRY?
“Lover Lay Down” by Dave Matthews Band: This song actually does make me cry, because it is the song that Chad & I had our first dance to at our wedding!

WILL YOU EVER GET MARRIED?
“Everybody's Free to Feel Good” by Quindon Traver

WHAT SCARES YOU THE MOST?
“Stumbleine” by Smashing Pumpkins

DOES ANYONE LIKE YOU?
“Jet Airliner” by Steve Miller Band

IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN TIME, WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE?
“Look After You” by The Fray

WHAT HURTS RIGHT NOW?
“Pleasure Bribe” by The Pietasters

WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS?
“Bodyrock” by Moby

Conversation with Aiden

2008-11-10T12:31:00.001-06:00

As Aiden and I walked home from the bus stop (the end of the drive way), we had the most interesting conversation.

Me: "Hey buddy, how was your day."

A: "Good! Hey mom, guess what!"

Me: "What's that bud?"

A: "I know who I am going to marry."

Me: taken aback "Really, who's that?"

A: "Arianna."

Me: "Why do you think that you are going to marry Arianna?"

A: "Because, she kisses me everyday when I get off the bus."

Me: "Oh, she kisses you everyday? Where at?"

A: "Sometimes on the cheek, but mostly on the lips."

Me: "Oooookkkkkaaaay. What happened to Jena? I thought she was your girlfriend."

A: "Oh, well, she still kisses me too, just not as much."

Dude! I am so not ready for this!

The House of Ill

2008-11-07T08:13:00.001-06:00

I am having some serious déjà vu! It seem like last year at this time, the whole family was down for the count with a stomach bug. Here we go again. Only this time everyone has something different.

It started on Sunday, I woke up with a head full of snot. All I could do all day was blow my nose. By Monday, I sounded like trucker! I had a full on male raspy voice, it was HOT! But, the cold seemed short lived, I was feeling better on Tuesday.

Wednesday, oh Wednesday! This is when the shit, or puke rather, hit the fan. We had just dropped Aiden off at school. I was headed to the Y, when from the back seat I heard a noise. I wasn't quite sure what it was. I looked back and asked Liam if he was OK, he said NO! And then it happened, he puked! Not once, but three times, in my car! It was so disgusting! Poor kid didn't keep a thing down for the rest of the day, nothing, not even water.

**A side note, I have a terrible gag reflex. You should have seen the pitiful state I was in while trying to clean out the car! Ugh! All I will tell you is this, he filled the cup holder with vomit! OMG! I didn't puke, but man, it was a hard not to!**

Thursday, everyone seemed to be in relatively good health. I took Aiden to school and then took Liam back home so he could recuperate. Aiden came home from school, I fed him a regular lunch and fed Liam a sick boy lunch (you know, soup and crackers). 20 minutes later, Aiden lost his lunch. The poor kid was just like Liam, couldn't keep anything down at all.

So, here it is, Friday. I'm here at the house with two recovering children. Aiden was up on and off through the night. Liam still has an upset tummy. Mommy, well mommy might be going slightly stir crazy. It is amazing how little you get accomplished when you have two sick kids. Maybe today will be better, no one has vomited yet!

Oh, what do you think of my little face-lift to my blog? I stole the idea from Alicia!

Doing the Happy Dance!

2008-11-04T13:18:00.001-06:00

Liam and I have had a hard time with this potty training business. He is stubborn and pig headed, I don't know where he gets that from... Anyhow, last week he had a breakthrough or something. He finally made the decision to be a big boy. So, for the past five days we have been diaper/accident free, even at night! He even poops in the potty! I can't believe it. I really thought I'd be the mom with her 6 year old in diapers! All I wanted was for him to be out of diapers before his 3rd birthday. I got my wish two months early! So, here's to Liam! Mama is really proud of you!

I Just Love Halloween!

2008-11-01T10:17:00.001-05:00

We had a blast this year! This was the first year that Liam really got the hang of trick-or-treating. Both boys were so excited they could hardly wait until it was time to go out. Aiden must have asked 60 times if he could wear his costume before we went out. Here are some pics of our adventure.

Aiden as Anakin Skywalker

Liam as the cutest Chef that ever was!

We couldn't have asked for a better Halloween! It was 70* and beautiful. Everyone was sitting outside to hand out candy, we didn't have to worry about freezing our butts off, it was very nice! I hope you guys had a Happy Halloween too!

A Plan is Formulating

2008-10-31T07:59:00.001-05:00

Finally, I am in a better mood. I have been working on a new game plan for school and I think that I have found a good route. I found a new school, I think. I'll stay at the school I am currently at through Spring and Summer and hopefully I will start at the new place in the Fall (which was my intention with the other school as well).

I had a meeting with this new school, University of Missouri - St. Louis, on Wednesday. We talked at length about my former GPA, my current one and the cumulative. They calculate the cumulative the same way as the other school, so I thought I was screwed...but, things are a little bit different at UMSL. Yes, I still have my shitty 2.55 GPA but, they calculate your science GPA by itself and it is weighted double your regular GPA. The two GPA's give you a score and you are rated based on your total score. Did that make sense?

My science GPA is 3.65 (wooooo hoooo) and with the the crap GPA, it gave me a 23 on a scale from 1 - 27. So, I am really competitive for their program. So, there is some hope.

I can't apply until January, so things are still up in the air, which I can't stand. There are a few down sides too, it's a long way from home and the program is strictly a days, no nights. But, I can't help but be a little bit optimistic.

We'll see what happens.

Regret

2008-10-28T12:49:00.001-05:00

This is not a word that I use very often. I believe that the choices I have made in my life have shaped the person I am today, the good, the bad and the ugly. So, when I tell you that I am sitting here, kicking my own ass for the second time in less than a week...there are regrets involved.

I have pretty much been given the middle finger from the prospective school that I had chosen to get my BSN from. The sins of my past are apparently to big to forgive and there is little to nothing that I can do at this point to change the collective minds holding my fate in their hands.

I have been wishing that I could go back in time and talk to the 18 year old version of myself. I want to tell her to straighten up and take life seriously for five minutes. Stop being so pig headed. But, if I know one thing, it is this...I would not have listened to myself. I thought that I knew what was best for me. Nothing was more important to me than getting out of my parents house, getting out from under their thumb was all I could think about. So, I moved out, got a job and tried to go to college.

At first, I thought I could handle all that on my own. I was determined to prove my mother wrong. So, I burnt the candle at both ends, working full time and going to school full time. I did well, for awhile. Then, I started to skip class and care more about partying than class and the rest is history.

When I decided to go back to school, I was mortified of how I'd handled my first attempt at college. I sat in that counselors office and turned every shade of red as we discussed my old GPA. She informed me that once I had 12 credit hours at that institution, my old GPA would be forgiven. I made it my mission not to fuck up again. And I haven't. All the classes I have taken this go around have been A's or B's, I was proud of myself.

Now, it doesn't seem to matter how hard I have tried to make up for the sins of my past. I will continue to pay for those mistakes and I have no one to blame but myself. I am still trying to formulate a plan for my future. One that does not include giving up (although, that is what I felt like doing yesterday). Until I figure out what that plan is though, it will be hard for me to give a crap about the classes that I am in now.

Man, I am pathetic.

Pumpkin Patch

2008-10-26T22:03:00.001-05:00

We finally made it to the pumpkin patch today. We went with our neighbors, Dani & Barn and of course the fabulous baby Norah! The kids had a great time, they wore us out! Here are some pics from our day.

Norah hanging out with pumpkins

He-man Aiden

Temper tantrum Liam (in the middle of the corn maze)

Running & jumping

I feel so stupid

2008-10-23T17:23:00.001-05:00

I am hoping that blogging about this makes me feel better. Although, I doubt very much that it will. I would probably still be crying if Cristina hadn't made time to talk to me tonight. I'm just so embarrassed and disappointed in myself.

Most of you know that earlier this year I completely choked on my admissions test into the RN program (by 1 effing percent!). Instead of continuing on at that college, I found a new program that I was really excited about. I sent in my application and transcripts after speaking to a counselor. The counselor looked over all of my current GPA and told me I was a shoe into the program. Awesome!

Or not. I called the admissions office today, because I haven't received official confirmation of being in the program (granted the program doesn't start until Fall 09, but I applied in August). The counselor (same one I spoke with before) told me after a brief review of my file that my cumulative GPA (from 10 years ago and now) is too low. My current GPA is 3.85, but once upon a time, I just didn't care. The grades from 10 years ago are plaguing me now and I feel stupid for screwing up so badly in the past.

Part of me feels like it isn't fair that they are even using my grades from a million years ago, and another part of me is kicking my own ass. I know this is entirely my fault, but it makes me feel like giving up. Like doing all this work now has made absolutely no difference. I have a why bother attitude right now.

Cristina gave me some good advice. She told me to talk to the Dean of Admissions. One, because they didn't tell me they would be using these grades. Two, because none of these classes apply to the program, none! So, I think I will make an appointment to speak with the Dean in person. Not that they have said that I am out, because the counselor thinks that with my grades from this semester I can pull my GPA up to the 2.75 required to get into the program, if there is a spot left.

I don't know. I am sitting here shaking my head at myself. Feel free to use me as an example, tell your kids not to be like me. See what happens kids, when you don't take college seriously the first time.

So stupid!

Door to Door? Really?!

2008-10-20T14:56:00.001-05:00

Well, John McCain's people are campaigning door to door in my neighborhood. I was right in the middle of cleaning my house when there was a knock on my door. Aiden, went to answer it, a major no-no, so I grabbed the knob and opened it before I looked to see who it was.

This old lady with a clip board and McCain/Palin sticker on her chest was on my porch. I groaned internally.

Lady: Are you Jessica?

Me: I am

Lady: I am such-n-such from the Republican National Committee, can I ask you a few questions?

Me: Sure, but you won't like the answers.

Lady: Can I ask who you'll be voting for?

Me: Sure, I'll be voting for Obama.

Lady: I suppose that means Chad will be voting the same way?

Me: You suppose correctly.

Lady: And are you pro-life or pro-choice?

Me: Pro-choice

Lady: (shaking her head) How do you feel about gun control?

Me: There isn't enough of it.

Lady: Who will you be voting for Governor?

Me: Jay Nixon (also a Democrat)

Lady: Would you call yourself a democrat or a republican?

Me: I bet you can guess, Democrat.

Lady: OK. Thanks for you time.

I don't think she could have looked more disgusted if she tried.

A "Fuzzy" Update

2008-10-15T13:03:00.001-05:00

Hahahaha! I just realized that none of my friends know what/who the "Fuzzies" are. LOL! When Chad was in college he was nicknamed fuzzy. It's a long story. Anyhow, when we got married his friends started calling us Mr. & Mrs. Fuzzy. Once we had kids, we became The Fuzzies. Well, now that that's clear, on to the update.

For those of you following my photo blog, you know that I was working on a scarf for Aiden. I would be done with it (scarves go fast) if, Liam hadn't pulled the entire thing apart while I was at school the other night! Yeah, I was thrilled! So, I have started a new one... my hands are feeling arthritic!

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My mom is doing better, she has been following up with her doctor on her high blood pressure and has committed herself to a very low sodium diet. She needs to do more, but this is a step in the right direction. Sadly though, my sister, nor I, have much faith that even this small step will hold. We give it a month, two at the most.

Speaking of my mother, she is coming to visit for a week, starting Sunday. Keep your fingers crossed that I don't up and kill her myself while she's here. I know she is coming to help me (I'm trying to be super mom and do this Book Fair thing at Aiden's school) but, the woman drives me crazy! Let me give you an example of why my mother drives me nuts. This happened this morning:

I'm getting the boys ready for school. It is 7:55, I have to be out of the house no later than 8:05 to get Aiden to school on time. She (my mom) calls the house, I do not answer, I don't have time to talk. She calls my cell and leaves a message. She calls the house again! This time I answer:

Me: Is someone dead?

Mom: No, why?

Me: Because you just called 3 times in a row.

Mom: Oh. No, I just wanted to talk.

Me: Can I call you back, I'm trying to wrangle the kids, get out the door and get Aiden to school. I'll call you from the car, K?

Mom: Don't bother. Obviously, you have more important things to do. **Click**

SHE HUNG UP ON ME!!!!

So, I call her back once I am in the car. She refused to answer! AHHHHHH! Infuriating!

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Aiden had a killer ear infection this weekend. He was up the entire night on Saturday. This is not an exaggeration. He passed out from exhaustion at 6:30 a.m. Sunday morning. It was really bad. The ear drum ruptured and that made him throw up. Good times! It broke my heart to see him in that much pain. He is on some heavy-duty antibiotics and feeling much better.

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Mid-terms are over, so I am half way through the semester, it's going well. I am getting a B in math currently (but I can pull that up) and an A in psych. That makes me happy. I can't wait to be done with this semester. I am just not feeling school this semester, for whatever reason.

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I guess that is about it. Things here are busy, but good. Thanks for reading, hope I didn't bore the pants off you!

Not Prepared

2008-10-09T16:44:00.001-05:00

My mother is young, she is all of 49 years old. To say that I am unprepared to deal with potential parental illness is an understatement. Although I feel that she is too young for illness and disease, she hasn't taken very good care of herself. In the past few years she has suffered from kidney stones and kidney blockages. Last night though, last night was something I wasn't ready to deal with. My father had to take her to the hospital because he thought she was having a heart attack.

When they admitted her her blood pressure was 222/100! Her EKG came back OK, but they put her on blood thinners and other medication. They admitted her and kept her overnight. She went through a stress test this morning and everything turned out alright, her heart is in decent shape. That was the good news.

The bad news, she is a prime candidate for a stroke. At 49, my mother is high risk for a stroke. I don't even know how to wrap my brain around that. Her blood pressure is so out of control that the cardiologist told her she is lucky she hasn't had one already. She is already on blood pressure medication, so I don't know what else she can do to prevent this. I know nothing about this, at all.

I know that she is fine for now, but she has to commit to a healthier lifestyle. I'm sorry to say this, but I don't think that she is capable. To take care of her kidneys properly, she'll have to change her diet significantly, which she won't do. I don't know what she'll have to do to prevent a stroke, but if it has anything to do with exercise...fat chance that will happen. Which makes me fear that I will lose my mother at an early age. I know this sounds very pessimistic, but I am trying to be realistic.

I don't know why I am writing this, I guess this is just my way of dealing with things. thanks for listening to it.

Weddings & Tacos

2008-10-06T12:22:00.003-05:00

Sorry, this is kind of long and kind of catty. If you can get through it, I am sure it will give you some giggles as well.

My cousin got married this Saturday, I'm not particularly close to that side of the family (actually, my Aunt, the mother of the bride and I absolutely loathe each other). I would have been content to just send a gift and call it a day, but my mother threatened me within inches of my life to come to this wedding, so I did.

We got in Friday night, my entire family was there waiting for us, most of them were a little on the tipsy side. Chad & I decided to play catchup with them. I caught up, too fast. 5 glasses of wine in 2 hours, I was hammered and Chad wasn't much better. That wasn't supposed to happen, I was supposed to save the heavy drinking for the wedding. I won't take all the blame, the political conversation (if you can call it that, it was more of a yelling match) was making the wine go down faster. I was out numbered by republicans and was defending my democrat stance loudly.

OK, cut to wedding time.... The church was nice, the ceremony was going fine, pretty much your standard fare until the pastor says to the bride and groom "...Jesus loves you so much, that if he had a refrigerator, your picture would be on it. If he carried a wallet, your picture would be in it." What?! Even my super religious brother was shooting glances at me and giggling like a 2 year old at that.

Between the hokey pastor and the absolutely HUGE wedding party, many jokes were made, sometimes I really love my husband and siblings, they were hilarious!

The ceremony was relatively short, which was good, anything longer and we might have been thrown out for laughing too much. Did I mention we were sitting 2 rows behind the brides mother and father. We headed to the reception and this is when things got interesting.

The Cucchiara clan love a good party. We are loud, crazy Italians who enjoy drinking and eating on other peoples dime. So, you know your reception sucks when we all 1) Searching our phones to find the nearest taco bell 2) discussing exit strategy.

You see, when we arrived they had appetizers sitting out for guests an open bar. They ran out of appetizers before even half their guests had arrived from the church. Most people were starving, but we have to wait for the wedding party to arrive, be announced and seated before they open the buffet. OK, we'll settle for the open bar.

Two rounds of drinks and the wedding party arrives. They have the DJ do the introduction of the bridal party, not your normal introduction, you know like, "Please welcome Bridesmaid and Groomsmen Sarah & Jake" No, no! It went something like this:

"Sarah has known Jennifer since they were children. She attends some random fucking school, getting arbitrary degree in basket weaving! With her is Jake, he's known Jimmy for 5 years, they play football together on weekends...." You get the idea. It would have been cute too, IF they didn't have 7 bridesmaids, 7 groomsmen, 3 flower girls, 2 ringbearers and a partridge in a pear tree to announce. Good god man, it took forever and we were hungry!

Finally the bride and groom were announced, we can eat - Oh, wait, No!- Wrong again. Each table was assigned a song, when the song was played you were allowed to get in line for the buffet. My dad tried, in a classic mafia style, to bribe to DJ to play our song first with a $50 bill. The DJ turned us down. Yeah, Dad... you tried to make him an offer he wouldn't refuse, you are not Don Corleone. Back to the bar.

My brother and husband come back with round 3 of drinks to inform us that we just got the last of the booze, they are out. WTF?! Seriously Aunt K, have you met our family?! This is when my dad yells "You know I have enough food and alcohol to water and feed all these people at my house, maybe we should move the party there!" Our wait finally ended 45 minutes later when the bride told the DJ to play our tables song.

It was sweet relief to finally be in line, I was so hungry. We pile our plates and sit down to eat, the food was awful! 1/2 real mashed potatoes mixed with 1/2 instant mashed potatoes, BLECK! While, we were eating they started playing ice breaker songs, like the chicken dance and the hokey pokey. Even though more than half the guest were still eating dinner, we were all glad that it seemed like the reception was moving forward to party mode. Then they hit the brakes. The DJ stops the music and starts reading "The Love Story of Jennifer & Jimmy"! You could look around the room and see the crowd losing interest fast. We decided to make our collective escape. We had to "go to the bathroom" and never come back.

We all left and changed clothes, we had plans to reconvene. Chad decides that he is still hungry, he could hardly stomach the food. He decided that we were going to stop and get a taco. Dad decides that he wants to get tacos for all of us, he wants to order 3 dozen tacos. Hmmm, there are only 10 of us (and we had eaten, kind of) 36 tacos seemed like a lot. We ordered 24 tacos instead. Here's Chad ordering:

Girl: Welcome to Taco Bueno, may I take your order?

Chad: Er, I would like 24 crispy beef tacos, please.

************Silence*************

Chad: I'm not kidding.

***********Silence*************

Chad: I'm sorry (giggle)

Girl: OOOOOKay. Would you like any salsa with that?

Chad: Yeah, I'm ordering 24 tacos, you better give me a variety.

Dad: Hey! You have any tequila in there?!

Girl: Ummm, no tequila. Your total is $26.75

Pull up to the window

Girl: $26.75

Dad: You accept cash? Cause that's all I got!

Girl: *laughing* Yeah, I think we accept cash.

I'm fairly certain we left an impression on her.

We met back up with my siblings, ate tacos and drank. It was better than the reception, more laughs for sure. I was still in bed before 11:30. Sad.

Feeling Creative

2008-10-02T12:26:00.001-05:00

I have never considered myself a creative person, quite the opposite actually, I lack creativity. Well, since I have been doing my Project 365 blog (only a week now, I know), I have been feeling a lot more creative. I have noticed that I have been looking at things differently, everything has become subject matter. I want to find a creative shot, something different. I can even find art in skittles. I guess I should thank Cathy for suggesting the Project 365 idea, I am really enjoying myself!

My Car is Cursed!

2008-09-30T22:02:00.001-05:00

Yesterday, the car won't start. Today, I get rear-ended, seriously? I was driving home from dropping Aiden at school, this stupid mini-van stopped short to make a quick left turn. I had to slam on my brakes so that I wouldn't hit it, I look into my review mirror and a silver mustang is coming up on me too fast. I knew that I was going to get hit and I had no time to swerve or move off the road.

He hit my car, it seemed fairly hard but, there wasn't a crunching sound. I turned into the subdivision to survey the damage and the car felt fine. I got out and went to the back of the car, not a scratch, phhhhhewww! A sigh of relief.

The boy, all of 17 or 18 years old, gets out of the car, shaking. I felt sorry for him. He was so upset, he must have apologized a thousand times. I told him, no harm, no fowl. I let him off the hook. He gave me a huge hug. Then 3 more huge hugs. Poor kid.

Everyone is fine, I don't think Liam even knew what had happened. Seriously though, I think my car just might be jinxed.

You Can't Make This Stuff Up!

2008-09-29T08:39:00.001-05:00

What a shitty day this has turned out to be and it isn't even 9 am! I have been sick for days and have shown no signs of improvement, I wanted to go to the doctor, but I can't. Why can't I? The same reason I couldn't take Aiden to school or go to the store to get some medicine for Liam and I...because someone left the lights on in my car! The same someone who took the kids to the grocery store on Saturday. And since I haven't been out of the house since Thursday, you can guess who that someone is! UGH! Chad! My car is dead, I have no jumper cables and my one friend that could help me, she gone today!

So, Aiden gets a free day from school, Liam & I will suffer without medicine and doctors appointments, all because Chad doesn't know how to check the lights on the car. Oh, and to top this day off, I spilt a full cup of coffee all over the floor! Hurray for Monday! I'm lovin' life right now!

The Very Red State of My Street

2008-09-26T12:20:00.004-05:00

Is it bad that everytime I walk or drive down my street I feel rage? Everywhere I look there are stupid McCain/Palin signs. Ugh! You people are such sheep. I told Chad that I want to put a HUGE Obama/Biden sign in our yard, he refuses. First, he feels that your political views are just that, yours and therefore should be kept private. He equates putting a political sign in your yard to putting a "I'm an Athesist" sign in your yard and it isn't anyone elses business. Okay, I get that. Secondly, he thinks (and it's probably true) that our house would be egged or otherwise. I just get sick of feeling so out numbered on my street. It's time to move (fat change that will happen)!

Because I'm a Sheep!

2008-09-25T16:17:00.002-05:00

My friends Cathy, Kristin and Amanda are participating in Project 365, taking a picture a day and posting it on their blogs. This was something that I felt would suit me well, I love to take photos and the idea of getting to chronicle a whole year in photographs...well, I couldn't pass it up. I hope you check it out here.

An Award? For Me?

2008-09-25T14:07:00.001-05:00

So, here I am trying to catch up on my blog reading and what do I find? My friend Cathy has a given me a blogger award called Arte y Pico, it's an award given for creativity and interesting blogs (which makes me wonder if Cathy knows what creativity is, because I know I am neither creative or interesting). Thank you Cat, you made me blush!

Part of receiving the award is posting the rules about the award so, they are as follows:

1.) Choose 5 blogs that you consider deserving of this award based on creativity, design, interesting material & overall contribution to the blogger community.

2.) Post the name of the author & a link to his or her blog so everyone can view it.

3.) Each award winner has to show the award & put the name & link to the blog that has given him or her the award

4.) The award winner & presenter should post the link of the "Arte y Pico" blog so everyone will know the origin of the award.

5.) Post these rules.

Now the hard part, who do I pick when almost all the blogs I read have been picked?!

1. Jenni, she doesn't write often, but when she does she leaves me in stitches most of the time.

2. Annita, another hilarious mother! She dazzles me with her quick wit!

3. Chrissi, when she has time to blog, it is always smart, well written and real.

4. Danielle, she blogs about her adoption journey for her daughter, it's very beautiful.

5. Kristin, not for her everyday blog (which has already been awarded) but, for her food blog. It's yummerific!

My Visit with Jenni

2008-09-21T17:15:00.001-05:00

Well, she is already gone. The weekend went by so fast! I hope she had a good time. I tried to give her a taste of St. Louis by taking her out on Friday and Saturday.

Friday we went to Forest Park, St. Louis was having a Balloon Glow and Balloon Race over the weekend down there. I thought it might be fun for us and the kids but, we get down there and nothing had been set up. So, we start walking around the expansive place and come across the Zoo. We had nothing better to do, so we took the kids to the Zoo for the day. I love that the St. Louis Zoo is free. It makes the decision to go there super easy. We all wondered around for hours, we wore the kids out! I was going to take pictures of this but, silly me, I forgot to check the camera batteries...DEAD.

Friday night, we ordered St. Louis style pizza and toasted ravioli and than we began to drink... now, that I got on film! Jenni, Chad & I drank and played rock band. Jenni is pretty good on guitar and far superior to me on drums....Dude, I sucked! I sang all night, which was fine with me!

Saturday, I took Jenni to get her very first pedicure (I can't believe she had never had one before either!) Then, we headed down to Main Street St. Charles, it's a historic area in the city with lots of restaurants and shops. We had a good time eating and meandering through the shops. They had two different festivals going on too, an Irish Festival and a Starving Artist Festival.

Here is where we had lunch:

This is Main Street Saint Charles:

I had a fantastic time! I can't believe how fast the trip went. I hope to see Jenni again soon, although I think that I'll have to go to San Diego next time!

Day One with Jenni

2008-09-19T09:03:00.001-05:00

Jenni made it here safe and sound! The boys and I went to the airport to pick her up yesterday afternoon, we got there just in time, her plane was early.

We were waiting at the gate and as the people were deplaning, Aiden decides he has to go poop. Of course he does. So, we head to the bathroom, he stays in there for what seems like a decade! finally he comes out but, we had missed her. So, we head to baggage claim and there we find her...cute as ever!

My first impression of Jenni, in person, is that she is teeny, not tiny, teeny! She is as tall as I am but, she is so small she is nearly see through! And adorable!

On the way home from the airport we decided to stop and get something to eat. So, I took her to Culver's, not so much a St. Louis thing as a Mid-Western thing, but yummy! Then we came home.

I am sure that I bored her pants off last night, all we did was hang out at my house (Chad had school last night). My kids warmed up to her pretty fast, fast enough for Liam to puke everywhere in front of her.... GROSS! The kid gorged himself with water than puked everywhere....nice, right!

I cooked dinner last night, nothing fancy, just some fettuccine alfredo and a cherry pie for dessert. Then we watched tv and chatted the night away.

Today, I am going to take her out and show her some of the city. We just have to wait for Aiden to get home from school and we are off.

I promise to take pictures and post them soon.

So True Liam, So True!

2008-09-12T12:46:00.001-05:00

I'd like to share a conversation that Liam had with Chad the other night. I don't think I have heard a more true statement from my child in short little life.

Picture Liam screaming like a banshee because his foot is stuck in one of his toys. Chad tries to help, but Liam is still screaming at him.

Chad: "Liam, if you would please calm down, I can get your foot out of there."

Liam: "NO! I DO IT!"

Chad: "If you just calm down, I can take care of this in just a few seconds."

Liam: "NO! You no talk to me!"

Chad: "Liam, seriously, this will only take a second. If you would calm down this would already be fixed."

Liam: "No, NO, NOOOOO! You no listen Daddy, NO!"

Chad: "Oh, Liam, why can't you just be logical for a minute."

Liam: "I NO LOGICAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Couldn't have said it better myself sir. You are certainly not logical.

Success, Finally!

2008-09-07T08:36:00.001-05:00

Liam has been successfully peeing in the potty for two days. Thanks to some advice I got from a friend, I bribed him. At first, this didn't work either. I bought skittles, made rice krispy treats, made cookies and got him his favorite yogurt covered granola bars. I will was willing to give him just about anything for him to pee in the potty. Eventually, the skittles won, that and telling him that I threw away the diapers.

He has been going consistently since yesterday, although we haven't had a poopy yet and we haven't been been without accidents...I am just glad he is doing it! I'm very proud of Liam right now!

Potty Training Woes

2008-09-02T17:34:00.001-05:00

Someone once told me (I think it was my mother, which should have stopped me in my tracks right there from believing anything further) that it is easier to potty train the second child. HA! Whoever said this, obviously they have never met Liam! Liam, the most stubborn child on the planet, has been "able" to be potty trained since his second birthday. He has the know-how, but he refuses to use it.

We had a few set backs with Aiden in the potty training department, we started training him at 2, but he wasn't interested. I was pregnant, so we decided to wait until after Liam was born to potty train him. This worked out perfectly, a month after Liam was born, Aiden was more than enthusiastic to pee in the big potty like daddy. It took only a few days to get him trained.

So, taking Aiden's potty training experience and applying that to Liam, we waited until he was 2.5 to really start trying to training him at all. But, 2.5 has come and gone and we are now on the down hill slide heading toward his third birthday and we are no closer to having him pee in the potty than we were at his second birthday.

I have tried padded underwear, a small potty seat, letting him pee in the big potty with a small seat on it, peeing in the big potty without a seat on a stool...the kid has a plethora of options. So, why won't he pee in the potty? It's a control issue. He refuses to relinquish his control over this matter and it is driving me slowly insane.

I took the boy to the store this weekend and had him pick out some new underwear, trying to get him excited about wearing underwear. He picked out some rocket ship underwear, he wanted to wear them as soon as we got home. I was excited, I thought this might be a break through. He agreed to try to go the bathroom every time Aiden or Daddy went to the potty. He didn't though. He walked to the back door and peed in his pants! AHHHHHH! Sheer insanity I tell ya!

I know he is ready for this, when a kid can tell you he peed or pooped and that he wants a new diaper, he should so be going to the bathroom in the toilet! Grrrr!

What is wrong with me?!

2008-09-01T13:20:00.001-05:00

I'm in a funk, which seems to be going around lately. I'm stressed out and tired. I'm in this total nobody likes me, everybody hates me, I'm gonna go eat worms type of mood. I haven't felt much like interacting with anyone. I hope that I snap out of this soon, even I am sick of my mood. Bah!

Just an Update

2008-08-25T12:02:00.001-05:00

Things have been crazy here since everyone is back to school, when I say everyone, I mean everyone. Liam is the only one who doesn't have to be anywhere at any particular time.

Aiden loves school and is doing great there, I drop him off at the door now, instead of walking him to class. He has really grown up. He was picked as star student last week and everyone in the class drew him picture, it was really cute!

Liam has finally adjusted to Aiden being at school and now refers to the Y as his "school". I think it is pretty cute actually.

Chad has class on Thursdays. I think he truly regrets working on his Masters or at least having to take this class to get his Masters. He has this Engineering Finance class that he is taking that looks like hell in a book. It seems like absolutely no fun at all!

I survived my first week back to school, but man I have a shit load of homework! My math teacher, the anti-christ, assigned 7 sections of homework, it's the first week back! Who does that?! I know that most of it is review, but still...WTF?! I have my psych class too, at least the homework in there was some reading (some 47 pages) and a quick review test/quiz. I'm working on getting it all done, although, there just doesn't seem to be enough hours in the day.

Oh and I am still running, I ramped up to 3/4 of a mile today. My legs hate me. I run wrong, how can you run wrong? Well, I lead with the ball of my foot, so I get pain up the side of my legs, it is something that I have always done and never been able to correct. It will stop hurting in a couple of weeks, in the mean time, running hurts. Other than that, I am doing pretty well with it. It feels natural and I am not struggling as much as I thought I would given how much bigger I am than when I used to run before. The body really does remember what to do.

So, that is pretty much it from the Peterson household! I hope everyone is doing well!

Inspired by Kristin

2008-08-20T15:43:00.001-05:00

My friend Kristin has started training for a 5K. From what I gather, she was never much of a runner, but that hasn't stopped her from getting out there and trying. She has been blogging off and on about her progress and the more I read, the more inspired I became.

You see, once upon a time, in a land of different bodies and children who were not yet twinkles in my eye, I was a runner. I used to love it. I was actually training for the LA Marathon when I found out that I was pregnant with Aiden.

For a long time I have felt like I couldn't run anymore, I didn't have the body for it or the stamina. The more I read about Kristin's progress, the more I thought that I should give it a try. So, for the last two weeks, I have been running. It has been gradual, I've started out slow because, lets face it, it hurts to run. I started by doing just a 1/4 mile everyday and now I am up to a 1/2 mile everyday. I hope to be running 3/4 of a mile next week and so on. Maybe I can run a 5K soon.

See what you have done Kristin, something I never thought I would do again. Thanks for the inspiration, it feels good to be running again!

Ugh!

2008-08-18T12:54:00.001-05:00

Summer officially comes to a close for me tomorrow and the dawning of new semester begins. It has been a good summer, better than I expected. I figured with all the free time I would get bored, hardly! These boys kept me running all summer long.

This was the first break I took since going back to school 18 months ago. I went 4 straight semesters, including last summer, I was due for a break. I have really enjoyed having this time off, which makes me dread going back now.

The thing about being in school is that I feel like I miss so much, it is entirely my fault, I shouldn't have put going to school, a lesson I will be sure to pass on to my kids. I get so busy during the semester. I spend 3+ hours a night in class, then hours on end doing homework, because I am so freaking competitive about my grades.

This semester will particularly tough since I am taking a lot of math, I hate math. It should be interesting to see how I handle all this. I know that I'll need my friends to vent to, so be prepared for me to bitch a lot! (Yeah, that'll be different! I never bitch...hahahaha)

Photo Challenge: Look at What I Made!

2008-08-17T15:22:00.001-05:00

This week Manda was in charge of our photo challenge. She wanted us to take pictures of things we made. I was in a baking mood this weekend, so I made brownies, from scratch. I had fun taking pictures of the baking process, but I'll only bore you with a couple quick photos!

Chopping Chocolate

The rest of the ingredients

The final product, taste tested by Aiden, of course.

Adjusting

2008-08-14T11:34:00.001-05:00

We survived our first day of kindergarten, but it appears day two is worse than day one. You see, realization sets in, my baby doesn't need me anymore. Let me give you some examples:

1. He washes and dresses himself for school without any help.

2. He does his own hair and he does it well.

3. He gets his own drink for breakfast and doesn't spill a drop.

Lastly, and most heartbreaking, he didn't need or want me to walk him to class today. He knew exactly where his room was, he went right in, put his backpack in the right spot and went and sat in his seat. He looked at me and said "See you later Mom, have a good day."

Liam is having a hard time with this too, poor kid. When we dropped Aiden off, he cried the whole out of the school, saying "I need my Aiden, where's my Aiden"

We will adjust. Tomorrow, per Aiden's request, we will be dropping him off at the front door "just like everyone else". Man, where does the time go?

He's a Big Boy Now

2008-08-13T12:16:00.001-05:00

Well, it has arrived! The day I had been dreading all Summer long, Aiden's first day of kindergarten was today. He looked so handsome, so grown up.

I drove him to school and he rode the bus home this afternoon. He was all smiles when he got home, he said he had a great time!

I didn't cry, I was happy, sad and proud all at the same time. I can't believe my baby is old enough to be going to school, it is such a huge milestone. I guess they have to grow up sometime.

Our Week at the Beach

2008-08-11T07:57:00.001-05:00

Our trip didn't go exactly as we had planned, but seriously, when does anything go like you planned? In preparation for this 16 hour car ride, I bought a dual head DVD player, so the boys would be entertained and I would have to listen to them complain. I had Chad set it up in the car the night before we left so we could just pop in a DVD and be on our way. I asked Chad on Friday night, "Did you test the DVD player?" He said "Nah, I am sure it will be fine." Well, all was not fine, it didn't work. The DVD player wasn't broken though, Chad's AC adapter in his car was broken. We drove the 16 hours in the car and the boys had little to no entertainment, and to my surprise, the boys did amazingly well!

We drove the 8 hours the first day to Charleston, WV. We had decided to camp out in the Kanawha State Forest, it was really beautiful there.

Here is our campsite:

The boys!

Aiden doing his best Tarzan impression

We finally arrived in North Carolina on Sunday, but not before Chad got pulled over for speeding. He was too busy looking around at how pretty things were to keep tabs on his speed. He was going 88 in a 65, oops! This spawned many Back to the Future comments from me.

We arrived at our destination around 3:00 p.m., the house was empty, so we kind of freaked out. Chad was all paranoid that I had gotten the wrong dates, but they were already at the beach, that's were I would have been too!

Our house was beautiful! My Aunt & Uncle gave Chad & I the master suite with an adjoining room for the kids. They were unbelievably generous, they paid for the house, as far as I was concerned they should take the biggest room. They said they wanted us to be comfortable. WOW!

Here is the house, our room is the one on the top floor!

The view from our room

Here are some random pics from vacation...

The boys completely wiped out from too much sun

Our beach hang out

Chad's spiral sunburn (I'm still giggling about this) When some one tells you, "I put circles on your back, now let me rub it in." You do not walk away from them before they can rub in the sunscreen! Chad learned this the hard way.

My cousin Kate blowing bubbles with Liam

Singing Beatles Songs

And.... Bob. We actually got along all week, he didn't ask to be called Dad or Grandpa. He said he was just grateful for the opportunity to spend some time with all of us.

So, that is our trip in a nutshell! I missed the internet! I missed my friends! I am glad to be home!

And, We Are Off...

2008-08-01T10:17:00.001-05:00

The clothes are packed, the food is ready and at 6 am tomorrow morning, we will be off on our adventure. I am still apprehensive about the whole Bob situation. I think I will be taking my brothers advice and having a talk with Bob about his lack of grandfather status. It will be too confusing to the boys to thrust another relative on to them. Bob is a difficult guy, so this talk maybe a pain in the ass, but it will have to be done. I WILL NOT call him Dad and they WILL NOT call him grandpa.

I will be bringing my computer, but I don't know if I'll have an Internet connection, thank god for the iPhone, I know I'll be able to stay in touch with that. I'll send updates, I promise! I'll miss you guys!

Oh, Procrastination!

2008-07-29T07:29:00.003-05:00

We leave for our family vacation to North Carolina on Saturday, ask me what I have done to prepare for this trip...NOTHING! I should be doing laundry, going to the grocery store to pick up snack items or packing in general, but I haven't done a thing.

Maybe it's the 16 hour car ride that has me procrastinating, I'm not looking forward to that at all, but I really think that it is because I know my biological father will be there. It was the only factor about this trip that had me reconsidering the whole idea.

You might be asking, how is it that your estranged father is even coming on this trip? This trip was my Aunt & Uncle's idea, I haven't seen them for 7 years (since my wedding day). We have kept in touch over the years, but they live in North Carolina and I don't. So, when my Uncle (my biological father's brother) called and asked if we wanted to come to the beach for a week on him, I was excited. I said yes, before I asked questions, bad idea. He didn't mention that Bob would be coming on vacation with us until the third phone conversation, by then we had already committed to going.

I have concerns and I think those concerns are putting lead in my feet about going on this trip. First, Bob is an alcoholic and I don't want that around my kids. Second, he doesn't know my kids and I don't think he has any right to, he has never even tried to be a grandfather to them and I don't think I am going to take to kindly to him trying it out this week. Third, how do I explain to my kids who he even is? They know my step-father as my dad, this is just going to confuse them. AHHHHHH!

Chad keeps saying that if he over step his bounds, we can just pack the car up and leave. He's right, we can do that. I am just hoping it doesn't end up being too awkward. Wish us luck, we leave on Saturday.

Photo Challenge: Photo & Haiku

2008-07-26T12:40:00.001-05:00

This weeks photo challenge was a little hard for me. Jae's wanted us to take a picture that was not family related and then write a Haiku about it. I have never written a haiku in my life. Jae took pictures of food, which actually inspired me to do the same. So, here is my photo & haiku, forgive me if it is as bad as I think it is.

Oh, I love sushi.
Even the cheap, easy kind
Get in my belly!

Photo Challenge: A Moment to Myself

2008-07-22T08:49:00.001-05:00

This weeks photo challenge is brought to you by my good friend Alicia. She wanted us to post pictures of what we do when we have a few moments alone. My alone moments are rare these days, but here is what I do when I have the time.

Go to the gym

Listen to music

Read

Get a pedicure

Play on the computer

The Party! (Photo Heavy)

2008-07-20T14:50:00.001-05:00

Aiden's 5th birthday was this weekend. Everyone and their brother came out for this party, which was great for Aiden, but madness for Mama. The boy raked in the mother-load of Star Wars action figures and Transformers. He is one happy kid.

We had his party at a place called Playtime Party Center, picture a smaller, cleaner version of Chuck E. Cheese with a Hippo mascot. Can you smell the burnt pizza?

Here is Aiden with his girlfriend Jena

Just having a good time

Getting his hand print put on the wall

Liam riding a motorcycle

Eating pizza (could he look more bored?)

Blowing out his candles (look at those dimples)

A visit from Henry the Hippo

Guess What I Got?!

2008-07-19T07:54:00.001-05:00

Just a quick note today, since I have a ton of family in town for Aiden's birthday.

As some of you know, awhile back the diamond in my engagement ring fell out. I have been ringless for awhile. We have a family friend who is a jeweler, when I went to visit my family for my Dad's birthday, I asked them to make me a new ring. My parents brought it to me yesterday. It is gorgeous and I could be happier with it. So, here is a blurry picture of my new engagement ring.

10 Memorable Vacation Moments

2008-07-17T08:46:00.001-05:00

From Ten on Tuesday, even though it is Thursday. What can I say, I have been busy. Here are some of my most memorable vacationing moments in no particular order.

1) Jardins du Luxembourg - Paris, France

Chad & I sat together under a tree and people watched for what seemed like years while we ate lunch that we picked up from a little la boulangerie (bakery).

2) A Pub - Cahir, Ireland

Chad & I did a Bed & Breakfast tour of Ireland. One of the stops was this little town Cahir, we were kind of disappointed in it until we hit this pub. There were people playing traditional Irish music in one of the booths (no they were not a band that was paid to play, they were just there and wanted to jam). We ordered our drinks and someone behind us heard our American accents, that was it! For the rest of the night, people were buying us drinks and talking with us about American politics and how much our President sucked. It was awesome.

3) Ireland, Post Cahir en route to Cork

We were so hung-over that neither Chad nor I could actually speak without wanting to hurl. We got into our car to drive to our next destination in silence, I think there was some grunting and nodding.

4) Arriving in Shannon, Ireland

We are at the airport, we get our car and get LOST on our way to our hotel. Chad had never driven a car on the "wrong side of the road" and lost sight of the side view mirror and knocked it off while we crossed a small stone bridge. Yeah, we didn't fight at all that day.

5) Not really a vacation, a mini-road trip.

When I was in high school, my best friend was in lust with a guy she had met while on vacation with her parents. She beg me and 2 of our friends to go on a 4 hour car ride to go see this boy. We all piled into a car and took off, all of us failing to mention to our parents what we were doing. We were gone 11 hours and in some deep shit when we got home. BUT, the road trip itself was so much fun.

6) Lake of the Ozarks, MO

Taking the boys down there for the first time, taking them on the boat. Aiden driving the boat. There are a ton of good memories there, a ton of "firsts" for the kids. Not to mention, it was really beautiful.

7) Versailles, France

I cannot accurately articulate what it is like to walk into that Chateau. The grounds were beautiful, Chad & I walked the grounds together in sheer amazement. It was awe inspiring and romantic.

8) Flamingo Casino Lobby - Las Vegas, NV

Standing there with my luggage after being delayed hours, looking around for Cathy, a nervous wreck, wondering if I'd even recognize her and if she would recognize me...since we had never met or anything.

9) Thanksgiving 2002 - San Luis Obispo, CA

Chad & I went to a friends house for the Thanksgiving holiday, we drank some wine from a local vineyard and fell in love with the scenery. The whole time I was there I was beyond exhausted and sick... we found out I was pregnant a few days later... oops on that whole wine thing. On a side note, this is the place I want to live. Chad & I said if we ever won the lottery, we would buy a vineyard here. I guess I better start playing then.

10) Riviera Casino - Las Vegas, NV

A group trip with Chad and all our friends from college. It was the first time I had been away from Aiden, he was 7 months old. I had just stopped breastfeeding, I leaked through my bra and shirt during lunch with everyone! Mind you, none of these people had had kids yet (Chad & I were the first of our group of friends to marry and have kids). Talk about embarrassing.

Party Preparations

2008-07-14T07:54:00.001-05:00

OR... Oh my God, I think I might actually be dying!

Aiden's birthday is this week and for the first time ever we are having the party where we live. Aiden really wanted a party with the kids from his old preschool and we thought this was a reasonable request, especially since all of his birthday parties up to this point have been almost completely devoid of children all together.

I sent out invitations to my family, not really thinking or intending for them to come, I mean who is really going to drive all that way for a kid party? Apparently, everyone! Well, crap! Not that I don't appreciate the fact that all of them are coming, I think that it is wonderful Aiden has so many people who love him, but this means a ton of housework for me.

So, yesterday I began the exhausting process of whipping my house into shape. I cleaned out the refrigerator (I mean, I removed every single thing out of it and scrubbed the whole freaking thing! It wasn't this clean when we bought it), dusted the entire house and then the big job, the kitchen floor...

Allow me to go off here on a small tangent...

When we bought this house, I wasn't in love with the exterior it is a little plain, the living room was nice, but nothing too terribly special, the bedrooms were big enough, but the thing that sold me on this house was the kitchen! The HUGE 600+ square foot kitchen. I loved that it had enough space for everyone to fit in there while you cooked, that no one would really step on anyone's toes while you were in there. Oh how naive of me!

Since the kitchen is where we spend the majority of our time as a family, it is the room that gets the dirtiest. Yesterday, in my mission to get things ready for my family, I got on my hands and knees and scrubbed the kitchen floor. All 620 square feet of it, including the base boards and walls. It took me 4 hours, without breaks, to scrub it all. It was exhausting.

Why bother? Well, I guess because I am a little neurotic. This will be the first time some of my family members see my house (and it has been good and lived in these nearly 5 years). I know that when I go places I look at peoples base boards (mainly to feel better about not cleaning mine). Anyway, it's done. You can eat off those floors. And no, I am not delusional enough to believe that they floors will stay that way all week without some maintenance, but the grunt work has been done and now the spot cleaning will be easier.

I'll tell you though, my arm and hand are in bad shape. The are so sore from gripping that stupid scrub brush. It was almost impossible to go to sleep last night, my arm ached so much. Oh well, my kitchen has never been cleaner.

Photo Challenge: A Day in the Life (Super Photo Heavy)

2008-07-12T12:44:00.001-05:00

PREPARE TO BE ~~AMAZED~~ bored out of your mind! This weeks photo challenge is brought to you by Cathy. She thought it would be fun to capture a day in our lives on "film". A very creative idea, but it shows me just how boring I am.

7am Cartoons

8:30 am Bath Time

10am Off to the Gym

My Work Out Partner Susan

12pm Lunch

1pm Laundry Folding - BLECK!

2pm Play Time

Please ignore the spilt milk on the slip cover and the corner of the slip cover that is not on the right way, please and thank you.

3pm House Cleaning

4pm Playing Outside (yes, Aiden is wearing a Halloween costume outdoors in 100* weather)

5:30pm Temper Tantrum

6pm Dinner

6:45pm After Dinner Horse Play with Daddy

7:30pm Bed Time Story

7:45pm Hurray Kids in Bed Drink!

So it Begins...

2008-07-09T15:54:00.001-05:00

As I was driving home from the gym, I got a little lost in my thoughts. Thinking about things that needed to be done, I realized what day it was, July 9th. There is nothing particularly significant about the date except that it means that there are only 9 more days until Aiden's 5th birthday. That made me sad.

I know it is silly to be sad that Aiden is growing up, especially since he is turning into such a fine little man. It's just that he starts kindergarten in little more than a month and then everything will change. It sounds dramatic to say things like everything will change, but essentially everything in our little world will be different.

We have a nice little routine that we have been carving out and refining these past five years. We spend most our mornings at the gym, our afternoons at the park, at the pool or running errands. Now, I know that Aiden went to pre-school, so not all of our days were exactly like this, but most of them were. His pre-school only lasted 4 hours and only 3 days a week. I guess it's just strange that he'll be gone everyday.

Chad keeps reminding me that Aiden got to be with me and only me for 2.5 years and now it will be Liam's turn to get my undivided attention. I suppose that he is right, this will a good time for Liam and I to bond (or for him to send me to the funny farm).

It will be a new routine of dropping Aiden off and picking him up, of homework (and yes, kindergartners do get assigned homework) and projects. Things will be different.

Don't get me wrong, I am excited for him and proud of him, he was the youngest kid taken into the kindergarten class this year. He is ready for this. I just can't believe how fast it has gone by.

After his birthday we are going to pick out his school supplies and buy him some new school clothes. The first of many trips to come. It seems so surreal.

You think I sound all weepy now, you just wait until the first day of school! I'm gonna be a mess. It doesn't help that Aiden asks me everyday if today is the day he gets to go to school. It is generally the second question out of his mouth (right after, how many days until my birthday). He isn't going to miss this stuff at all.

The Food Snatchers!

2008-07-08T11:51:00.001-05:00

Everyday, I make the kids lunch, always at the same time and always before I make my own. I usually ask them exactly what they want and almost always they get what they ask for.

Me: "Boys, it's lunchtime. What would you like to eat today"

Aiden: "I want a corn dog, fruit and carrots with dip!"

Me: "Liam, does a corn dog, fruit and carrots sound good to you?"

Aiden "And dip!"

Me: "And dip?"

Liam: "Uh-huh!"

Me: "I am making myself a tuna sandwich, does anyone want that instead?"

Them: "NO!"

So, I go to the kitchen and commence with lunch making. About 15 minutes later, I emerge from the kitchen with said lunch. They are eating and I go back to the kitchen to make my tuna sandwich. They have finished eating and are putting their plates in the sink, I ask...

Me: "Did you get enough to eat?"

Boys: "Yep"

Me: "You sure you don't want anymore?"

Boys: "Nope."

I come out of the kitchen with my sandwich and fruit. I sit down, it doesn't take them but 10 seconds to come over to me and start snatching things off my plate. It doesn't matter what I have on my plate or if they stated 5 minutes earlier that they were in fact full. Nope, they must steal all the food off Mommy's plate! Does anyone else have this problem?

Photo Challenge: Fireworks!

2008-07-06T11:09:00.001-05:00

This week it was my turn to come up with a photo challenge for my friends and I. Well, my photo challenge day happen to fall on the Fourth of July, so I totally coped out and chose fireworks. Chad went out of his way this year to insure that the boys had fun oooohing and ahhhhing at the fireworks and spent a ton of money. It was quite a show.

All Things Good in Moderation

2008-07-02T08:40:00.001-05:00

Before I get into this too far, I'd like to state that I truly do love my family. With that said, I have seen and spent too much time with them recently to care whether or not I love them.

This past Saturday was my Dad's 60th birthday celebration, after many discussions with my husband and family, I decided that we (the boys and I) would come and stay the week with my family.

We arrived here on Friday, the day before the party, so most of our time was filled with helping with preparations for the party. This was good actually, it gave the boys and I things to do and we weren't stepping on the toes of family members in the process.

Saturday was the party, which was a lot of fun. By the way, I didn't eat any of the pig, it freaked me out. I did, however, drink far too much and even had a few "I love you man" moments...sad, I know.

Sunday, yeah...this is when people started getting on my nerves. My kids had had enough of being here and my family gets more obnoxious the longer you are around them. To get away from my parents, I went to my brothers house to watch a movie. My little sister decided to tag along, it wasn't so bad.

Monday, we decided to take the boys to the water park. My older sister, either in effort to be a good sister OR (and I think more likely) to throw her parenting duties on to someone else and decided to bring her daughter to the water park with us. Jordan (my niece) is a very nice girl, she is just in that pre-teen, I think I know everything I don't need you phase of her life which makes her a joy to be around. She didn't have much to do with the boys while she was there, which I understand, what would a 10 year old have in common with a near 5 and 2.5 year old anyway.

Tuesday was my Dad's actual birthday, he decided to take the day off and spend it with the boys. He took all of us out to see Wall-E, by all of us I mean 6 adults and 3 kids. It was quite an adventure. My older sister & her husband hated the movie and complained through almost all of it. Never mind that it's a kids movie and her kid is 10! Ahhhhhhh! No one said that you had to go! Anyway, the boys loved the movie and so did the rest of the class, even if it was tainted by the jeerings of a 30 something year old woman and her dumb ass husband!

After the movie everyone came back to Mom and Dad's house, we all had dinner together and watch TV together. This is just a little too much togetherness for Jess.

So, here it is Wednesday. This is the first real time I have had on the computer, because my mother takes personal offense if you want any kind of alone time while you are here. Apparently, I need to be speaking to her 24 hours a day. Don't even get me started on what she does when you are trying to read a book.... AN-NOY-ING!

I can't wait to go home tomorrow. I miss my bed, I miss my house, I miss alone time. Oh, I guess I miss my husband too, I haven't been alone enough to miss him, my little sister has been sleeping in my room while I am here, so I don't have time to be alone, even in bed!

Someone save me!

Sixty is the new Forty

2008-06-30T07:54:00.001-05:00

Or at least that is what my dad would like to think. This weekend we celebrated my father's 60th birthday Luau style. I can only hope that I can do 60 as proud as my Dad did this weekend, that man drank everyone under the table, myself included. Although, he doesn't remember me driving him home!!

This was quite a production, we even had a full pig!

Here is Dad overseeing the cooking (the man can't keep his fingers out of stuff, even when is told not to touch)

Poppy and all his grandchildren (Jordan, Liam, Aiden & Giada)

The perfect t-shirt (translation Still Sexy at Sixty)

It's a shame that we didn't get any drunken photos! These people (my family) are crazy! A good time was had by all, especially Dad, that man can drink!

Friday Photo Challenge: Favorite thing about Summer Time...

2008-06-27T19:40:00.001-05:00

That's an easy one! Outdoor exploration....

When is my real life going to start?

2008-06-25T07:44:00.001-05:00

Because I know this can't be it, right?

My kids and I are not seeing eye to eye right now. They are in some kind of bad behavior phase, these phases are difficult when only one child is going through them, but to have both kids going through some kind of "push mommies button" phase together...well let's just say mommy may not survive.

It's like these two little wondrous beings are sitting up late at night conspiring on what toys they can fight over the next day. Aiden's room has become the war room, he and Liam are strategically planning what new way they can fight, what new argument they can have that will make mommy crack under the pressure. I bet the conversation goes something like this:

Aiden: So, we've nearly got her where we want her. OK, Liam, tomorrow I'm going to sit next to her on the couch and you come up and start screaming because you want to sit where I am sitting.

Liam: Ooooo! Then you smack me, hard, but not too hard. Then, I'll scream really loud and you laugh.

Aiden: Yeah, that's good! Then she'll get really mad and try to put us both in time-out, but you know this never works when we go to time-out at the same time.

Liam: heheheheh, then we'll have gotten what we really wanted, to move her from her spot so we can both sit there together. Muwahahahahahaha!

It doesn't sound that sinister, but it is!

Looking at these faces, you'd never suspect them of being capable of driving a grown woman insane, but looks can be deceiving.

Aiden

Liam

Yeah, I know you think I am crazy! Maybe I am. LOL!

My Husband is Showing me how..

2008-06-23T20:20:00.001-05:00

To use Live Writer! It's amazing-spiffilicious stuff. This is a test, and this is Aiden at age numero-uno. See how the spiffy text wraps around the picture! My husband is a freaking genius. Except, it took him five tries to spell genius.

New To All This

2008-06-23T17:19:00.000-05:00

I've never been a good writer, I used to keep a journal on a mommy networking site. I recently left that site and thought it would be a shame to not continue to write about the wonders of parenting. Plus, it was a good way to keep track of how my children are growing up. So, here I am blogging for the first time, all so I can keep the memories of my family. I hope you enjoy watching my trials and errors of my parenting abilities (or lack thereof) and what it takes for me to just keep being me in the middle of all the insanity.

P.S. Please forgive me for my lack of competent writing skills.